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Breakup 101

2007-11-18T10:22:00.000+08:00

Well hello there people. It's really been quite a while since I posted something here on this blabber sheet. Ok lot of things had happened. Major ones, good ones, bad ones and everything in the middle. Well Dale and I are no longer together after 5 fruitful and not so fruitful months (but I am ok now). Well almost not a hundred percent. I guess that break ups is not really my thing. Its nice because it is the recognition of one's perspective that the other person or some particular reason does not coexist with yours. It doesn't necessarily mean that it is 100% negative but sometimes breakups are the only solution for you to realize and know where your place should be.

Bitternessis always tailgating the process of breaking up. The feeling is actually like poison being drawn out of the vein. I don’t want to sound dramatic but at the same time it is always tainted by emotions. Why? You spend emotions trying to make yourself the ideal person for your partner, but sometimes we get blinded and get too immature when the process begins. It isn’t easy, I know this very, but you tend to lose yourself. Yes I am a bad person when it comes to breakups. I warn you people don’t go into a relationship with me. I personally say that it is just a yin yang concept. The amount of love is sometimes overshadowed by pain that it releases a completely equal amount of hate. I believe it’s also a matter of which lineage or country you are in. Westerners could just go and drop anyone in an instant. I am not saying it is not painful, but at least they handle it a little better than most Asian people do. Most middle-eastern countries would kill if they catch their partners cheating or when they tend to separate with them. This includes setting them on fire, or chopping a particular piece of human anatomy.

Filipinos are different. Love is both a soothing elixir that gives life to one’s heart, or a paralyzing poison waiting to consume every bit of sanity. Well I wish that I would completely dissolve any inexcusable actions if ever I break up with someone again. You become this lunatic and delusional person, feeding on rage, pain and loneliness. You spend so much time thinking who is she with now, are they making love, are they kissing. You start to feel irritated when you pass by the places that you and that person used to to. It’s like constant Immolation. A blanket of scorching frustration envelopes your body day after day, minute after minute.

But to your surprise, one day at a certain moment, everything mellows down. You relax. Your mind relinquishes all those dervishes of negative thoughts. You see everything clearly and realize that everything happens for a reason. Yes everything happens for a reason. It may take as long as 2 years before you completely let go. But surely enough it would definitely be revealed when the right moment comes. One reminder, never ever get someone new for revenge or for a false reason of companionship. It’s bullshit. Being separated sucks enough for you, then why the hell perform it unto another person.

Another thing guys (and girls alike), breaking up is one way for that rift between you and the person heal. It’s not an overnight matter, and time will always play a factor when it comes to this process. You may hate each other or even do stupid things. Don’t imitate someone like me who gets hell bent sometimes, when the reality of the situation sinks in. Never deny or suppress your feelings. Instead of keeping them openly talk and let it ooze out of your system. Ask yourself if you are ready. Don’t cover up emptiness by broadcasting to the world or that you are now single and open for new prospects. Think and heal yourself, emotionally and spiritually. Find ways to cheer yourself up and keep yourself busy. You were able to live without them before then why not. Do not push yourself unto her circle and instead strengthen and fill your own with new friends or fortify old relationships.

Again it is a process and you have to get the courage to do so. Writing this article doesn’t even ensure anyone that I am no longer hurting, but then again I am willing to take that process. Breaking up doesn’t mean that it’s over for both of you. It could be a simple time-out or just a time off from the pressure of having both dynamic personalities. It is nice to long and yearn and even hope for that person to come back, but don’t forget that “futility” is also one word that might describe the end result of your actions.

Love yourself no matter what. Loving or setting aside a slice of affection for yourself is as important as giving it to someone. How could you love someone if you don’t love your self? Just remember love like water is good when abundant, but once it dries up everything dies.

As a parting statement love is risky and separation is the end result of an unbalanced or unsorted equation between 2 individuals. It doesn’t matter if it is a man-girl, man,-man or a girl to girl relationship. Love doesn’t recognize color or gender, only the synchronized tempo of two hearts beating as one. Thank you and I hope that you will come back again for more of my random ranting about life and everything in between.

Farewell Mia..."May You Rest in Peace"

2007-06-03T03:37:00.000+08:00

Mia Basa... a friend to remember

8 years ago I met this very special girl across our street while watching them play volleyball. I was still very young and was not able to distinguish between infatuation and true love, but I was very glad that I was able to meet that sweet girl. From that point forward I know that this girl would really play a significant part in my life both as an inspiration and a friend. For years even thou both of us had already gone doing diferent things , I know that she would always be a very special friend. Last year I saw her again happily married and was about to give birth to her first child and I am very happy even thou were no longer that close as before. Weeks passed and they were given a very beautiful angel named Bea, and I knew that time that she really deserved all that happiness that God had granted her. A loving wife and mother and friend that was my memory of Mia.

Earlier this morning I was on my way to Andrea's office to finish some of the Tarp orders that I was doing for MSN. It was a very typical but beautiful day. I ordered her favorite organic chef salad and a large size mango kiwi drink for me. When I checked my fone I got four calls form my mom and sister and I was kinda suprised with the urgency of those calls. When Andrea and I finised the tarps we went over to this warehouse to buy display materials for Ms. Kris Aquino and Tito Boy Abunda's flowershop which she manages. Once in the car I checked on my messages and was taken aback with what it says: "From Mama-Gian alam mo na bang Patay na si Mia?". I was surprised and was speechless while the message sank in to my mind. I was just in their shopt last week and she looked so lively and ok naman. Puzzled and shocked I called up home and asked my mom to confirm the news. Moy mom had told be that Mia suffered Aneurysm and that which proved fatal for her.

I really felt sorry for her husband and of course Bea. She's barealy a year old and hindi man lang magkakaroon ng chance na makasama ang mommy niya. I knw we havent been able to catch up through the years but hey first time kong ma feel ang ganito kabigat na strain emotionally. Now all I can say is that may her soul rest in eternal peace. I will always remember you and would always cherish you as a friend. Thanks for the memories and I know God dont plan things to go worng, but they have a deeper pupose and meaning. To her family, my deepest condolences.

I offer your favorite song which forever I will hold dear in my heart. Goodbye my friend, until the the we meet again:

CELINE DION LYRICS"

I Love You, Goodbye

"Wish I could be the one

The one who could give you love

The kind of love you really need

Wish I could say to you

That I'll always stay with you

But baby that's not me

You need someone willing to give their heart and soul to you

Promise you forever, baby that's something I can't do

Oh I could say that I'll be all you need

But that would be a lie

I know I'd only hurt you

I know I'd only make you cry

I'm not the one you're needing

I love you, goodbye

I hope someday you can

Find some way to understand

I'm only doing this for you

I don't really wanna go

But deep in my heart

I know this is the kindest thing to do

You'll find someone who'll be the one that I could never be

Who'll give you something better

Than the love you'll find with me

Oh I could say that I'll be all you need

But that would be a crime

I know I'd only hurt you

I know I'd only make you cry

I'm not the one you're needing

I love you, goodbye

Leaving someone when you love someone

Is the hardest thing to do

When you love someone as much as I love you

Oh I don't wanna leave you

Baby it tears me up insideBut

I'll never be the one you're needing

I love you, goodbye

Baby, its never ganna work out

I love you, goodbye

Rest in peace my friend...

Lakeshore Adventure!-Mexico Pampanga!

2007-05-27T06:33:00.000+08:00

Hello guys. Its been a while and I just finished having my first break for my shift. Well kaka birthday ko lang and hindimpa rin matuloy tuloy ang inuman na pinaplano ko. Sa mga kasama ko kapit lang basta malibre. Now back to my feature post! Weeks ago I was able to have a little bit og respite by going to Lakeshore with Andrea and her Clients Olive and Richard. Wwe went there for their pre-nuptial photoshoot with renowned photgrapher and friend Jervy Cruz.

Well it was a bit tiring coz I was coming off from a shift and we had to stop by Bambi Reyes' salon for their hair and make up sessions. Andrea also had hr nails done and a supposed 2:00 pm embarkment was moved to a 4:00 pm sched. Well travelling north means a smoother and faster travel for me and the gang with the exception of the jerks from mexico pampanga where these youngsters try to trash your windshield by throwing rocks and other debris (dapat aksyunan na to ng mga kinauukulan). Well after an hour and a half drive we arrived safely at our destination and the place was really very nice.

While waiting for Jervy to arrange the necessary permits for the photoshoot I came across a really cute cat that was exceptionally friendly (even thou it was a first time confrontation with us). So after payaing and feeding the cat for about half an hour jervy arrived and we started setting up for the shoot. The whole shoot started with a boatride from the main dock to the central island (the whole place is actually a big piece of recreation and housing property with its man-made lake being the centerpiecs and central island complete with swimming and party ammenities ), where most of the style and candid shots were taken. I was really taken away of how wonderful the first set of pictures came out specially the off frame shot where Olive and Richard were asked to kiss. After the first set, I cant help but take a dip on the pool itself because of the scorching weather and dry feeling of travelling and moving around the place.

Main Dock and Central Island

Poolside and Boat Ride

The way the pool was landscaped was simple yet very pleasing to the eye. A round pool good for 10-15 people with a limestone and rock based, man-made waterfalls ornating one side of the pool. It is really a nice backdraft for the setting sun for it really gave the shoot a very romantic feeling and a retro-feel to it (old school plus advance photography means pefect). After crossing over to the walkway area using a floating barge with a pulley system we preeceded with the second part of the shoot along the dock area and the light house as our backdraft. Night time came and after a quick but sumptuos dinner we headed back to manila ending the day with 14 hour long slumber.

Sunset by the Paddle Boat and Poolside Limestone Waterfall
Well dito na lang muna ngayon. Been very busy and there are a lot of restrictions with regards to our firewall in the office. I was alaso saddened by the fact that two of our wavemates (Deacon and Rhonna) are no longer with us due to personal decisions. We wish them all the luck and may we meet up again soon, one way or another. Again till my next post! Bye!

Goodness Month!

2007-05-07T11:03:00.000+08:00

Whew, hello It's been a while and a lot of things had been going on since my last post and I cant w8 to share it with you guys. 6 more days and Im turning a year older and so is my blog (weel march is actually shutteredlife's birthday). So without any hesitations let me take it away. (BTW guys you can reach me on my new globe number its 09156723472 or e-mail me thru my business e-mail nco_que_giangeles@msn.com -it is always on-line

Production At Last!

Well Last April I just finished training for MSN Tech Support E-Mail / Messenger (Level2), and I am now part of production. Everything seems going well and Im already comfortable of how the account goes. From having an average of 20-40 calls a day from AOL, I now handle less than 20 calls (Well the most that I had since production and Training was 11) for this program. The guys here are giving me and the group a lot of support and what makes it great is tahat most of them (if not evryone) really knows how to have fun. During graduation we had the chance to drink party over at gerardos and most of the tm's, sme's and co agents came buy. Even our OM provided more booze money to make the day even greater. I am still at the graveyard shift (2am/4am window) and Im enjoying weekends off. Well attrition rate for our team has increased a notch due to the depature of 2 our team mates again (from 25, down to 18). Well let's w8 and see what happens next. (Kudos to the ff. TM Joel, TM Jay, TM Dre, Manny, Mynard, Chris, Mutay, sheila, Mckoy and of course two of the craziest guys on the floor Steiner and Chico!).

New Sony-riffic gadgets!

Well I was able to buy a new phone at last and decided to sacrifice a little of quality tom accomodate my second psp. I had purchased a new Ericsson W700i and I am really satisfied with it. Merging the features of both my old phone (k750i) and the Walkman functionality and speed of w800i, I then for conclude that it was a nice buy. I was able to sell my p800 (napulot ko) for 3k and that really help augment my budget. For the psp I was able to buy a white version (blue and silver looks good) but then again white for me is so fly! Well all I need now is to finish up my other projefcts and take good care of my backpay to have a really prosperous year (again its year of the pig diba?).

Well thats it for today folks I'll just keep you updated with new things in the coming days! Well thanks for visiting my Blog and I hope to hear from you soon by leaving me a tag o message on my tagboard on the right. Again thank you and Have a nice day!

Arise...

2007-03-29T17:52:00.000+08:00

Well hello there people its been quite a while since my last post. Well some things have changed and I have some things to say for someone out there (geesh I cant believe I still have a bulseye mark on my back for the longest time tee hee). Alright then lets go!

Goodbye Hyperion! Goodbye AOL!

First of all I am very sorry to say that i am no longer with AOL, and sad to say that Im really missing all of you guys there, especially The Hyperions. Well I really learned a lot from you guys, and I wont forget the things that we did during our time together. To Vince maraming mraming salamat. To all of my friends there ( Caco, Mone, Ap, Jon, Mitch, Karen, Rex, TJ, Allan, Jayson, Mark A., Mark F., Dada, Mitch E., Rj, Ge, Chris, Manny, SOIC Cha, OM Alvin, Sol, Amor, Ram, Frank, Lara, Kat, Lisa, Audz, Lee, CBor, Ellie, Tl Karen, Yoyo, Mau, Rolf, Jerome and everybody else na di ko nabanggit! MAraming mraming Salamat sa inyong Lahat! Pasensiya na po sa lahat!

Hello MSN

On the lighter side, I already got a new job from NCO (Northern Collections Organization) over in ELJC Building (ABS CBN) as a Level2 MSN E-Mail support Specialist. I am very very happy with the way my training is going and I should say that evrything that I learned from AOL helped a lot. Well nothing really came into my mind until our first call sim, and I would really say that everything is good! Here are some pics from NCO and I just wanna say hi and hello to my new friends (Carlo, Rhona, Jon, Oliver, Duff, Lawrence, Josh, Volt, Eisie, Ian and especially Boo hehehe! Etc! Inuman na uli mga tsong!

Photos!

Videos

1.) WAVE 31 (HELM) Janero Party w/hards Performing

2.) WAVE 31-Shadow Fight

3.) Subo!

Farewell Memory

I just want to say farewell to a one very important person in my past. Youv'e already done it, and I know you have what it takes to conquer all of life's adversities. I wont react or blame you for whatever grudges or things you still have against me. I wont mind you telling things (negative ones) to your friends, or if you still think of me as shit, but just like what Iv'e said, only time could tell that I am still here as a friend (or whatever you want to call me gremlin, saudi boy I really dont care). You take good care of yourself and I wish you all the luck in the world! I dont need to mention names here. Be safe all the time, and I know that God and all your inner strength would make you survive. Thanks for all the lessons in life that youv'e given me. Your all grown up right now and there's always a monster ready to share the burden and pains that the future may throw at you. Well nothing more to say right now. "Arrivederci, fai buon viaggio e segui il tuo cuore"-For Choi

Thats It for now! Well Thanks again for visitng my blog! I'll keep it coming!

Sayonara

Hyperion's last supper (well it was breakfast).

2007-02-20T21:27:00.000+08:00

Last January 17 my team and I was treated to an eat all you can breakfast at "Circles" over at Shang-Ri-la makati, courtesy of our aol Head Honcho John Henry. With the team were the muses (boses) of ops headed by our Client Manager Shiela Tan, SOICS Cha Rigor and Sacha Larde. Team Hyperion (Before our the re-shuffle) consist of TOIC Vince Claur, Giancarlo Angeles, Eric Castro, Mark Alejo, miggs Joaquin, Grace Santos, Aimee Cabalo, Allan Saliendra, Carlo De Leon, Tine Peres, Shine Geronimo, Mike Monegas, Christopher Bayas and Maureen Bautista, Tristan Bautista and Anthony Ray Tapia.

Enjoy the PICS :

Mau, TJ (Aimee), Miggs and Tristan

Gee and Shine (Standing), Mau, TJ and Miggs

Naiinitan ka ba? Palamig ka muna with the new AOL Light On Fan! (Model "Gee" Included, Puwede Tumpok)

Milkshake Anyone, I'll serve it Straight up!

The Boys: (Back) Eric, Gian, Caco Ton Ton, Mark A. (Foreground) Tupe and Daboy

The Bosses Client Managers John Henry, Sheila Tan and SOICS Sacha Larde and Cha Rigor

The Brady Bunch-( Back) Totn Ton, Caco, Me, Mau, Shine. (Center) Miggs, Gee, TJ (Aimee). (Front) Mark A., Allan, Tupe, Eric, Tristan (Kami na lang ni Caco kumakain diyan).

Miggs lumayo ka baka makain kita! Gian prang yougurt lang yang calories na makukuha mo kay Miggs!

Why Being a Friend Is Key

2007-01-18T01:18:00.000+08:00

Who said dating was easy?
Were all here to help you get your love life
back on track!

This post will show you simple rules and tips to date by. Don't let another Feb. 14 go by dateless. With advance planning and
a little encouragement, you'll be well on your way to meeting other eligible singles.

Rule No. 1
A Friend Comes Before a Lover

Who wants a mate who doesn't enjoy the same things you do? Success lies in finding things that bring you together -- not apart. The more you're together learning about each other's likes & dislikes, you're able to set the stage for something meaningful.

Rule No. 2
Don't Let Familiarity
Breed Contempt

The better we know people, the more likely we are to find fault with them. Don't let bitterness come between you and others -- it will only push you further apart. Have new experiences to keep it fresh and moving. That might just mean being a friend first.

Rule No. 3
Listen for Once

It's not always about you. Step back and look beyond your immediate self to learn what makes others tick. You can learn a lot -- open your eyes to something new. And who knows, maybe your friend now becomes something more.

Rule No. 4
Make the First Move

Don't wait for them to reach out to you, make plans to catch up today, whether it's a long lost love or someone cute you met just last week. Don't let your destiny fall in someone else's hands -- pick up the phone now. Maybe something can be rekindled after all.

Rule No. 5
Share the Spotlight

One is a lonely number, but two can be lots of fun. Shifting your vocabulary from ''I'' to ''We'', says you understand the basis of any relationship. This can provide an immediate connection for others who are just starting to learn who you are and 'if' you'll become something more

High Hopes

2007-01-08T07:31:00.000+08:00

Well I’m still dead-tired after a two 3-hours/day OT scheme I’m doing. Nice thing about it is that I get to take in more MAC Calls than Windows, which make it worthwhile (windows users are so stubborn while MAC Users are more sensible). Bad thing about this is the volume of calls I’m having for the past 2 weeks. After the Tucson and Albuquerque sites had closed down. Most of the call bulks are being routed here in Manila. You’ll be surprised of how much pressure a newbie would feel handling an average of 40 calls a day and a high of 60 for tenured agents like us.

But hey I don’t really mind that now. OT hours are for the taking. Well it pays so much that I can’t believe how much money I’m going to be making this January alone. Hmmmm. My Salary was not yet adjusted for a month, which means retro-pay. My PA for 7 months will be coming out by the last week of January or first week of Feb. Heheh! What makes it more exciting is the fact that I double checked how much the N80 or N91 cost right now and it is still very feasible for the N80 will tally at around 21-22 while the N91 at 18. I am also planning to get a second white PSP for myself if the phone idea doesn’t really ring a bell.

I am back being single again, and it's kind of nice coz now I know that I really don’t have the time and the drive right now to run a relationship. Were still friends (Sam) and we'll just try again some other time but for now it is going to be I, work and family. Well that’s it for now. I just want to thank everyone for the wonderful 2006 you gave me and I wish everyone all the best this 2007. Hehehe! Happy New Year! Time to go home

Welcome to the Black Parade

by: My Chemical ROmance

When I was a young boy,
My father took me into the city
To see a marching band.
He said,
"Son when you grow up, will you be the saviour of the broken,
The beaten and the damned?"
He said
"Will you defeat them, your demons, and all the non believers, the plans that they have made?"
Because one day I leave you,
A phantom to lead you in the summer,
To join the black parade."

When I was a young boy,
My father took me into the city
To see a marching band.
He said,
"Son when you grow up, will you be the saviour of the broken,
The beaten and the damned?"

Sometimes I get the feeling she's watching over me.
And other times I feel like I should go. Through it all, the rise and fall, the bodies in the streets.
When you're gone we want you all to know We'll Carry on,
We'll Carry on
Though your dead and gone believe me Your memory will carry on
Carry on
We'll carry on
And in my heart I cant contain it
The anthem wont explain it.

And we will send you reeling from decimated dreams
Your misery and hate will kill us all
So paint it black and take it back
Lets shout it loud and clear
Do you fight it to the end
We hear the call to

To carry on
We'll carry on
Though your dead and gone believe me Your memory will carry on
We'll carry on
And though you're broken and defeated You're weary widow marches on

And on we carry through the fears
Ooh oh ohhhh
Disappointed faces of your peers Ooh oh ohhhh
Take a look at me cause
I could not care at all Do or die
You'll never make me
Cause the world, will never take my heart
You can try, you'll never break me
Want it all,
I'm gonna play this part
Wont explain or say i'm sorry
I'm not ashamed,
I'm gonna show my scar
You're the chair, for all the broken Listen here, because it's only..
I'm just a man,
I'm not a hero
Just a boy, who's meant to sing this song
Just a man,
I'm not a hero
I -- don't -- care
Carry on
We'll carry on
Though your dead and gone believe me Your memory will carry on
We'll carry on
And though you're broken and defeated You're weary widow marches on
We'll carry on
We'll carry on
We'll carry on
We'll carry
We'll carry on

Happy New Year!

2007-01-02T20:42:00.000+08:00

Hello Guys!

It’s the Start of the year and what else could I say. I wasn’t able to do a Christmas post and I’m ready to start the year off with a bang well of some sort. Ok lets begin. First of all I just want to greet everyone a very happy New Year.

Feeling very optimistic cause this is my year, (well I know I am as big as a boar) and hope everything goes smoothly. Now with some new plans for the blog. No more tear-jerky and melodramatic post. (I’ll try to switch back and forth form serious and fun stuff). Again time to do features and other write-ups about the different buzz around town. I plan to do my own Metro Manila Expedition and go back to the old-fashioned photo blog that I utilize before. I am also a month away form getting my brand new Nokia Phone (Well N93 or N91) I’ll let you guys decide what phone should I buy (answer my poll ok)… Now lets get down to business.

New Years Resolution…

1.) Financial Rebound and Growth

The last part of the year was really a big financial slump for me. I wasn’t really able to get my bearing. This time must manage my finances in a more productive manner. These include not emptying my salary account and also keep a constant budget on things. I’m going to start laying off on my Magic expenditures and cut off on the food trips and petty dates. A reward scheme for myself will be implemented and I’m going to try keeping personal stuff (A new phone and a secondary gadget should be enough for me this year).

2.) Fashion

For this year I intend to clean up a little bit. I plan to sport a trendier and sharper look for myself. Well I plan to have 2 new pairs (A brown and black business/ formal shoes) by Feb and then invest on at least 2 pairs of dress shirts or round necks). I haven’t bought a new pair of sneakers/rubber shoes last year so I still plan to have one later in the year. Well other things should come up as the weeks go by and well see what progress I could make.

3.) Work

Well as for work my stats seem to drop a notch after my mental instability during the last two months. Starting the year with two sales, a commendation and a revived call taking energy, things are looking beautiful. I managed to find that same grooved that made me excel during the last 6 months of my stay here at E-ETelecare. I plan to get my second promotion by either Feb or March, but that still depends on my Q4 Score Cards. But hopefully everything will still hold. Attendance is also a big factor this time. I’ll try my best to avoid unnecessary absenteeism and stay healthy for as long as possible.

4.) Family Relations

Well I’ve been very secretive about some of my activities and it really affected my family relations. So this time, no more unnecessary secrets and miscommunications with my family. They’ve stayed there the longest and I am very lucky to have them behind me all the time. I think it’s time for me to return the favor. I am very fortunate to have a

5.) Relationship and Love

Sorry got to do more important stuff.

6.) Faith

Well got to step it up when it comes to my religious responsibilities. Got to thank him for everything that comes into my life. For always being there when the going gets tough and always providing me when I really need it. All I wish for is good health for my family, friends and enemies.

Well that’s it for me for this year. If ever there are other things that may contribute to this changes, then I’ll keep you updated ayt! Happy New Year Guys!

Closing the chapter...Solace Fades....

2006-12-28T08:08:00.000+08:00

<< Please play the Song of the Post before reading

As I begin writing down a new chapter in my life, I slowly ink away the final days of a 6-year experience that molded my own individuality in the face of this earth. A chapter filled with wonderful, memorable and mournful things. I stop and look back at the one thing that kept me going. A reason that took my soul to the brink of Insanity and Happiness.

As I recount every second, minute, hour days and years I cant help but be thankful for it had happened. I thank thee for the first message. I thank thee for the first meeting and our first kiss. I thank thee for the confidence you gave me. Thank you for the love we’ve shared. I thank thee for all the fights and arguments that made our relationship colorful. I thank thee for the perpetual bliss that we shared. I thank thee for the laughter and smiles we both shared. The Breakfast, lunches and dinners that we both feasted on. The Birthdays, Christmas, New years and funerals we both celebrated. The Monsthsaries, Anniversaries. The unforgettable second meeting and the romantic night after your graduation.

All of these things helped mold the present us. We may go our separate ways and It may be hard walking these path with new hands and feet joining us. But life goes a round circle and may our feet bring us back again. Friends, lovers, enemies? We wont know. But one things for sure, I’m keeping you in a place worth knowing and easily not remembering for some time.
As I slowly finish the last pages of this chapter I remove all my vows and promises given to yo, and let ourselves be equals. I wont push fate’s wheels against its will, but I would certainly make sure I am ready to handle unexpected things. Now as I turn the last page of our lives I leave one page blank. We wont know when will my second book begin. A familiar hand may start the first verse or somebody new. AS for me I’ll turn the pages for them and let another wonderful story be written.

Life aint fair but the pains and sadness forever makes us stronger and love more tender. We become better persons, wounded but togher. In the end the tables of fate would lay down new horizons and new chapters in life would give us a chance to be a new character or an old player in life's unending game!

Farewell for now dear Ghost. Things may have changed, but our would never fade. Saya Cinta Amu!

Sayonara

One More Time let me play the song you thought me how to love. It may not served it's meaning, but it did worked for me, for I have wished it would have been the one I'll be singing my entire life.

"Spend My Life With You"

Eric Benet(feat. Tamia)

I never knew such a day could come

And I never knew such a love

Could be inside of one

And I never knew what my life was for

But now that you're here I know for sure

I never knew till I looked in your eyes

I was incomplete till the day you walked into my life

And I never knew that my heart could feel

So precious and pure

One love so real

Chorus

Can I just see you every morning when

I open my eyes

Can I just feel your heart beating beside me

Every night

Can we just feel this way together

Till the end of all time

Can I just spend my life with you

Now baby the days and the weeks

And the years will roll by

But nothing will change the love inside

Of you and I

And baby I'll never find any wordsThat could explain

Just how much my heart my life

My soul you've changed

Chorus II

Can you run to these open arms

When no one else understands

Can we tell God and the whole world

I'm your woman, and you're my man

Can't you just feel how much I love you

With one touch of my hand

Can I just spend my life with you

Coda:

No touch has ever felt so wonderful(You are incredible)

And a deeper love

I've never known(I'll never let you go)

I swear this love is true(Now and forever to you)

(only for you)To you

Chorus III

Can I just see you every morning whenI open my eyes

Can I just feel your heart beating beside me

Every night

Can we just feel this way together Till the end of all time

Can I just spend my life with you

Can you run to these open arms

When no one else understands

Can we tell God and the whole world

You're my woman, and you're my man

Can't you just feel how much I love you

With one touch of my hand

Can I just spend my life with you

(Forever here with you)

Can I just spend my life with you

Can I just see you every morning when

I Open my eyes

Dancing my love away...

2006-12-24T20:26:00.000+08:00

I remember a very nice line from the movie “Shall We Dance”. I still recall the first time I’ve seen the movie. It was early February this year while I was celebrating someone’s birthday over at “TGI-Fridays”. It was with someone really special and I really did not pay any attention. Earlier tonight I managed to watch the movie in full and I felt a pinch when I heard Richard Geres’s response to Susan Sarandon’s question “Why did you keep this from me” (Taking In Balroom Dancing Lessons )? Then he replied with “I am ashamed of telling you that I am doing something to make me happy, when I have all the “Happiness” in the world with you”.

Yes I was also victim of the same crime. I was so much happy with what I had before, and still I looked for something that I thought would make me happier. I had all the extra time and capability of giving that happiness to that special someone. I don’t know, I kind of felt sad in a way coz I only have 6 more days to go for that “SIGN” to come. Things are rather complicated if there is only one person willing to give something a shot. Would I regret my decisions? No one knows, but then again somehow a part of me still clings or, something still wish for something that another person is not willing to go through.

It’s a constant “tug of war” of both emotions and mental stability. Things are better when they are a bit complicated. Sigh! Well I’ll just let the days go by. Whatever happens in the last 6 days might as well be the best for both of us. Pain causes separation but something deeper makes the feeling stronger.

So guys and gals if ever you have excess happiness or energy to make someone happy, don’t look somewhere else, the person who deserves it is just right beside you. Loving you and considers you the best individual in the world!

Now I leave you with the song I don’t want to fall in Love by Tonya Mitchell- Hmmm…kinda got stuck in my head after listening to it while on my way to work

I don’t want to fall in Love
by Tonya Mitchell

Who needs to feel that way

Who needs those words to say

Who wants to give their heart

To watch love fade away

Cause I made up my mind

I didn't want to know

Why should I find the love that isn't here to stay

I wasn't waiting

Until you came alone

And now I need you

To tell me where my heart belongs

Chorus:

But I don't want to fall in love'

Till I fall in love with you

And you showed me what my heart already knew

I don't want to fall in love'

Till I know the love is true'

Cause I need

You to feel the way I do

When I give my heart to you

I've seen the tears they cry

When it's time for goodbye

I didn't want to be the onewho's asking why

I didn't think that I would ever feel so strong

But now I know that I was wrong

Chorus

Now I believe it's worth a chance

To find the love to last

For all my life

Give me a sign So I Will always know this love is right

This love is right

Ohhh

Chorus repeated until end

Departure 2-Exile

2006-12-15T13:54:00.000+08:00

Hello it’s me again. Man I really had a hell of a week (Sure, it was hell!) Ok during may last post I was talking about saying goodbye and dramatic retreat from all of those "Getting Over Blues". Well was I wrong? Slight. Yes I ate some of my words but please let me explain.

I met with the ghost some other time again (whoever is reading this I don’t care about you fool!). It was nice coz in the end I still miss and care for the ghost, even if she has a "walking X-ray partner". Divisoria is a very memorable place for us and I’m happy that I was able to go there and shop again for myself (not for her...err maybe a little). No tension, no animosity that’s how a day should be at least for two people who had a very colorful past. I was never pushy and sentimental that time. Everything went smoothly. A friendly walk and talk and that really made my day. Screw the on-going afternoon heat and the stinky sweaty bodies you bumped with along the 168 and DV Mall. What’s important is that I was haunted again. Traditional Coffee and Chicken finished the day up, and nothing beats two packs of Dunhill lights to wade the day away. Romantic? Nah. It was a "friendly" date. Hmmm.is it. Nah just kidding you guys.

Well so much for it. Am I over her...almost or....heheheh keep on reading on future posts. Well financially I am kind of drained right now. Hopefully come January and February everything’s going to pick up again. Sigh I really got to save. One more thing, yes I do have a girlfriend but to honestly tell you guys it's not the same as before. Well for starters I started having shorter sleeping hours and lots and lots of petty arguments. Its not as if I cant manage it, its just that nothing still sweeps me off my feet. Yes I do care for her (I hope love comes in next). Call me stupid but I still cant determine which is which. Siguro mahirap lang talagang tapatan ang ibang bagay (Di ba Skeletor"). Yah she's pretty and everything, but that "magic" something aunt that visible right now. I still have 15 more days to go and If it pushes through then I’m bound. But if within 15 days nothing sparks up then I know whom God really wants for me. Sigh no more details. I’m secured emotionally right now, and everything may not be as smooth as I want them to be, but I’m managing everything one problem at a time.

Now people ask me If I am still mad at "skeletor". Hmm a bit. I hope she treats Cory better (Yeah alam kong mabait siya, pero Damn shed some effort naman and do something special. Talk fool, wag kang tahimik at tango lang ng tango. Kaya nga may away para maayos ang lahat. Buwiset! (Sorry Composure na ito!). Now gusto ko pa rin siyang makasuntukan as In walang iwas take everything na kakayanin mo. kaya nga ako nagbubuhat at nagpapa bawas ng timbang. Hehehe. Cant wait for that day na mangyari yun. Its more of testicular fortitude than revenge. Hoy balik mo Blog ‘
ulol!

Well that’s it for that other side. Well back on lighter things. Work is getting easier and easier, and I hope come February I could nail the TSR 2 Promotion. That would really help a lot. An impending re-shuffling kind of concerns me but I hope that I still stay with Vince or at least Shift Armstrong (We love you SOIC CHA). I have nothing against the other teams or shifts but hey they are our bread and butter. The team's kind of struggling right now, but hey were getting there. I would like to finally reward myself with something that I’ve really earned skill wise. And hopefully I could reward myself with a nice Nokia-N91 Music Edition phone come Feb. Were! But na lang di ako programmer (joke). heheh!

Ehem! One more thing, I’ve noticed that there is a big influx of really cute and pretty ladies from the last 2 waves. Here a lot of my floor mates are having the time of their lives just by looking and trying to talk with these little sisters of mine (akala nyo poporma ako no?...uhm.... hello there). Some noticeable names are Marichu, Tanya, Janey. Lych, Rexie (Winona Ryde of the Floor), Mel (My Big Sister) and of course Dolly. Well just a compliment to these ladies for really lighting up the floor with your charms and beauty.

At it's almost three and I have to go. Damn my moms going to kill me for going home late again (Buwiset kasi yang sweldong yan delayed). Well overall I just wanna thank "Cars' and" Cai: for being my new blog buddies here. Please feel free to visit my "Friends'" blogs by clicking on the links on the right. Now I leave you this wonderful song from U-TURN entitled "Hurting Inside". I chose this song coz I love singing this with the most beloved girl in my life....awoooooo! Hehe! Bato bato sa langit ang tamaan basag ang buto!

HURTING INSIDE

by U-TURN

There are moments

That I feel I just can't go on

Wishing that you were here

Oh how I wish

You holding me close to you

Wispering those words

I love you (I love you)

REFRAIN:

But baby you're not there

Like you were before

No words of love to hear

Can't smile anymore

Is it finally over

I can't wait any longer

Do you ever think of me

Coz baby can't you see

CHORUS:

That I'm hurting inside

All the tears I can't hide

Life is never easy

without you baby

I want you to know

that I'm hurting inside

The pain is deep inside (I can't mend it)

Wishing you would come to ease the pain

In my heart

Coz lovin' you just hurts deep inside

Empty moments

They just fill every part of me

Since you've been away from me

Give me a chance to say how much I care

Hold me close to you and let me through

REFRAIN:

CHORUS:

Always Here Never Gone!

Departure.

2006-12-03T07:35:00.000+08:00

P.S. (I wont apologize for saying all the things in detail here). It’s the reality, and everyone should stand for the truth.

I was about to finish my last cigarette, when I realized what a fool I’ve been. Things were nice yet the true meaning doesn’t depict the anomalies lying underneath this smile. I may have a hard time doing this, but I am willing to make my way through this ordeal. It may take a lot of effort and emotional fortitude before I finally get myself out of this situation, but then again I must.

I was glad when I was given the chance to be with the ghost for a couple of times this past two months. I t was like a dream come true. I told myself “hey, this is what I want and I’m happy that it turned out this way. My days were thrown in turmoil. Dazed and confused I searched for answers, but all it gave me was more questions. Yes I was in-love, but the more that I yearn for something in return, eats more of my sanity, than preserving it. I then took upon myself to completely break of this so-called make believe thing.

It was a very nice day when I met up with her. We had a very nice dinner over at Temple Bar and finished the day off with the old fashioned Starbucks coffee. During the course of our conversation, I could feel the animosity and coldness of her words (but I wasn’t mad). Then I finally realized that maybe I should start living my life a little bit outside of her shadow. I never thought that I would be able to utter the words “I’m Going to Stop Now”, but I did. I am not hoping. I am no longer reaching for that elusive “love “ that kept me going.

I am now by myself. Alone but not lonely. I won’t be waiting, but I’m always ready. IF she comes back then good, if not then so be it. It was hard, but it’s the correct thing to do. I just want to promise you Corazon De Guia, that I am always here never gone, but this time you may have to look or call out for me. I wont turn my back on you. I’m simply going opposite your way. You said that you’re happy, then so be it. That’s all I want to hear. I’ll let you and your boyfriend find your own way of happiness. I don’t know how he handles your relationship, but I guess everyone knows how I treat you. I wont comment on how much effort his giving. I’ll just look away and let you grow. I know your capable of handling the relationship so I know there won’t be any problems with you.

Now I can walk around with my head straight. Lonely but no longer sad. I won’t wait, but I’ll always be ready. Your always welcome you know that. I am no longer frustrated or insecure with him. I know what is capable of for you, and I no longer have to compare. I’m satisfied with what reality has. Go your way, I’ll go mine. The world is round, so go straight and we may find each other again. I am the ghost not you.

Corazon de Guia, I never loved anyone more than I loved you. And no one, not even the man beside you could tell me that he loves you more than I do. I’ll give away my pride and everything just to make you happy, but I would wait for the right time to do that!

Remember boy, make my girl cry and you’ll die and pay dearly for it.

Be a man; give her the care that she needs.

Love alone cant keep you together.

She’s not a regular woman; so don’t be regular on her.

Still no sakura or cherry blossoms around me. It would always be autumn or winter. I’m always here never gone. What mine is always yours, and what I do is for you. You are my life, no matter how you treat me. Be cold as the snow, but my love and care for you will burn even brighter.

Saya Cinta Amu Cory-You truly deserve this line. For no one could make me love. The way that you do.

Been thinkin' of you

Like I always do my love

These tears I cry

Cause the day that I feared

Is finally here, my love

And I don't know why

Refrain:

You no longer see

Your tomorrow with me

Now we could never be... So...

Chorus:

You go your way

And I'll go my way

You know I can never

Force you to stay

You won't be mine

You made up your mind

So just keep on going

And don't look behind

I'll always hold dear

The times you We're here with me

And I won't forget

All the dreams that we shared

And how much you cared for me

I've no regrets..

Refrain 2:

Though now all I have Are long lonely nights

Cause you've already said goodbye

(Chorus)

Bridge:

I love you With all my heart and soul

And I never thought We'd ever fall

I know...you know You know just where you belong...

Here with me, here with me

(Chorus)

Cause you don't wanna see me

Down on my knees

I'll be kissing my dreams away

Now all I can do Is let go of you

And pray that you'll

Come back to me someday

To be continued...

Third Contact-Ghost Whispers

2006-11-26T16:49:00.000+08:00

It was a typical day yesterday. I only sleep for about an hour the previous night and I was still droopy when I started my shift. It was a good shift. I was able to make 3 sales and that really boosted my esteem and woke me up from my impending slumber. By the end of the shift I finally decided to call up the Ghost and meet up with it. At first I was undecided due to the fact that my phone was almost empty. I managed to send out one message and crossed my fingers that we would meet up at the designated place. I came thirty minutes earlier than the specified time and I was able to down to sticks of cigarettes before I finally caught up with her.

At first the typical tension and animosity crept between both of us, but I know that this day was different. We ate at our favorite pizza restaurant and were able to enjoy the whole meal without having a stressful conversation. We went on and bought some of her supplies then afterwards we went to starbucks to smoke some more and enjoy some coffee.

I was very reluctant and was holding back until our eyes met. The sheer innocence in her eyes made me fall back to the days when everything was still all right. We tried to talk casually but sometimes something between us still makes us unique. It’s not love and its not even something tangible. It is something that only years of contact and experience can forge. For 8 whole months that was the only time that I was able to freely place my hand on her skin without any animosity or uneasiness. I was also surprised when she returned the favor. It was something small but I am thankful that at least it happened . God is very wise. He lets you piece by piece on the things you want the most, for in the end those who wait and persevere are not left un-rewarded.

As we end the day I painfully reminisce and contemplate on the things I did (refer to the post below-"Anything For You"). We again part ways and I am back to earth once more. I thought of one thing and you know who she is. I ask myself am I still afraid of knowing that as the sun shine and sets she still belongs to someone. But what the heck I am happy and nothing more could make me feel this way. I don’t care about anyone or anything. I love one person and care for her the most. I thank God for giving me these things. It may not be much, but I am willing to stick around as required. I thank you Ghost for you have given me enough motivation and for letting me return the favor.

I end this post with a very special reflection: You still make smile and make me feel wonderful. I love You as always and more than ever. Always here never gone!

For the Ghost:

Holding Back the Tears:

I kind of keep asking myself little questions

Like where do I go from here

I seem to keep loosing track of time and how long its been

Since I last had you near

Been a painful road to a door thats closed

Been a gamble that I knew I couldnt win

Been a lonely conversation to this photograph of you

In the mirror theres a sign I must give in

So Im not holding back the tears anymore

Tryin escape the heartache, tryin escape emotion

No Im not holding back the tears anymore

Yesterdays my memory reminding me of all the time

I depended on you

I used to enjoy spending my time on my own here

Watching the jaded people pass

Now here I am sharing their pain and their lonely tears

And walking a road of broken glass

Its a constant fight to get through each day and night

Its a war between the present and the past

And the face thats in your mind every time you close your eyes

Whats the reason, whats the answer, how long will this last

So Im not holding back the tears anymore

Tryin escape the heartache, tryin escape emotion

No Im not holding back the tears anymore

Yesterdays my memory reminding me of all the time

Been a long time since I heard your last goobdye

Still I hear it clearly every day and night

Whats the point in love when you have to give it up

Yet still you need it and its nowhere you can find

So Im not holding back the tears anymore

Tryin escape the heartache, tryin escape emotion

No Im not holding back the tears anymore

Yesterdays my memory reminding me of all the timeI depended on you

Anything For You...

2006-11-25T03:39:00.000+08:00

Hello! I kind of feel sad right now. I read someone else’s blog and I am really worried about her. Yes I know it may sound technical and simple, but I know that this girl is going through a lot right now. How I wish that I never did the sins of the past. How I wish that I were still there whenever she needs uplifting or motivation. I hope I am always there to ease the things that she endures. To comfort her after a long day.

I’ve put her on this misfortune. She should not be soul searching, or worrying about love and any similar issues. I should have thought of her first before myself. But now I am here to make up for it. I’m so sorry baby (I just missed you calling that, it's been months). I am basically teary eyed now the moment those words came out of my mouth. I’m so sorry. You shouldn’t be in pain right now, If only I cared.

Laugh at me or ignore me about this, but as promised I’m always here to support you. I love you very much baby, and you’ll know you’ll always be.

For this post I dedicate this very appropriate song. Read the lines and you’ll know what I mean. I love you so much. -Ghost

Anything For you:
By Gloria Estefan

Anything for you

Though youre not here

Since you said were through

It seems like years

Time keeps draggin on and on

And forevers been and gone

Still I cant figure what went wrong

Id still do anything for you

Ill play your game

You hurt me through and through

But you can have your way

I can pretend each time I see you

That I dont care and I dont need you

And though youll never see me cryin

You know inside I feel like dying

And Id do anything for you

In spite of it all

Ive learned so much from you

You made me strong

But dont you ever think that I dont love you

That for one minute I forgot you

But sometimes things dont work out right

And you just have to say goodbye

I hope you find somone to please you

Somone wholl care and never leave you

But if that someone ever hurts you

You just might need a friend to turn to

And Id do anything for you

Ill give you upIf thats what

I should doTo make you happy

I can pretend each time I see you

That I dont care and I dont need you

And though inside I feel like dying

You know youll never see me crying

Dont you ever think that I dont love you

That for one minute I forgot you

But sometimes things dont work out right

And you just have to say goodbye

Glimpses of Autumn

2006-11-23T09:44:00.000+08:00

Autumn is considered by everyone as one of the most beautiful among the four seasons. It imbues the serenity and nostalgic feeling of winter but at the same time gives you that little pinch that make it extra special.

What and where have I gone through after a turbulent summer and a spring of self-discovery? Well here I am stable but still incomplete. How wonderful do god's playful fingers work around you. Giving you unexpected twist and turns. But hey I am glad that even thou they are surprising, at the same time they are very rewarding with the answers you ask about your life.

Well first of all I am very happy that I'm already given a "regular employee" status her at AOL. Well Six months of hard work had paid off and I wish to attain at least TSR LEVEL 2 Position or even CSS stature (expect Ram to start Bashing me As. Well its a long way to go and I’m enjoying work better than before. Cory and I are still very bleak as a couple but I’m still here for her. Well whets new with that. Heehaw. I’m patient now, and I enjoy it that way. Don’t you just like it when everything swoons your way without forcing it? But I am happy. A simple glimpse of her and smell of her hair makes me yearn, but at the same time feel satisfied with what am im getting. It is better than nothing.

Well, sometimes people wonder why can’t I shake her off. I don’t know either. Guys give me a break, I may look stupid or "martyr" but hey nobody’s' making me fall the way she makes me. Well I no longer care what he/she thinks. It’s something or a bond that makes me go for her, all the time. It's not as if umaasa pa ako, even thou masarap. Pero I’m glad that im still able to keep an eye on her. She might say that all I am saying is B.S. but hey I'll let actions speak for me. I love her yes. I may love somebody else in the future or not find anyone. But I know she's the no.1 girl for me no matter what happens. It would take a superwoman or even a goddess to make me forget about her or topple her position. Overall I am glad I was able to interact with different people and ladies during those times that we weren't talking, and I’m glad in the end nothing's changed. I am still madly in-love with the greatest girl I loved in my life. Don’t hate her please. I deserve everything that had happened and it made me think clearly and maturely this time around. I wont say anything about this matter with respect to her. I am still here for her whatever happens.

Now for lighter matters. Hey I am glad that I was able to re-design my blog again. As you’ve noticed you could again check most of the archive entries. A cleaner and darker layout makes the reader feel relax and a bigger and shorter box to come. I’ve also decided to make this blog both as an entertainment and more-interactive page. I already asked Lance to give assistance in setting up the multimedia jukebox (with play list) and I'll be adding other add-ons (PICS, BACKLINKS, FLOATER TAGS etc.) to make your stay worthwhile and would encourage new Bloggers in developing their own Blogsite. Also please disregard the past messages on my CBOX, coz I am having trouble logging unto my new one, so I have to make of my old one from my old blog. So just keep on posting guys and thanks for the support

In two weeks my sisters' going to get married and I’m glad that everything is going well and all the preparations are going on a planned. I almost went teary eyed when I helped my sister pack some of her things (she'll be moving out after the wedding over at Pasig in their new House). I can't believe how much I love her and you sometimes regret the times that you don’t see each other. But I am happy and envious at the same time. Envious of the fact that she’s going to be with the person she love the most, and I myself failed in doing so. How I wish one day I’ll be walking down the aisle with her (you know who) and tell her face to face how much I love her and how thankful I am that God didn’t took her away for good. And as the day nears I thank God for making my sister happy.

Now a little surprise. I HAVE MY OWN CAR! Well my dad just gave me our Box Type Mitsubishi Lancer GSR. Pero siguro di lang talaga ako Car person kasi after 5 mins wala na yung excitement ko. I need to have a new license by January so I can start driving again. Well good luck na lang.

Thank you again and I hope I can post the images later on. Thanks and Zzzzzzz.! Got to get some shuteye! Bye God Bless

P.S. I just want to congratulate My Co-Wave9 TSR’s. Were there and we’ll keep on moving up and forward, and to TL- Vince our new full-pledged TL we did it twice and we’ll do it again!

To Mel-Welcome to my Blog. It’s nice to have new Thomason Friends here on the floor.

To Ana-Lakas ng trip natin tsong sa Uulitin!

Placebo Effect

2006-11-17T03:04:00.000+08:00

Just got back from a very special day over at the “Shang “ in Mandaluyong. Guys I suggest going over at the 6th floor Starbucks and spend a time with your “very special” someone. Nice ambiance and the lighting make the overall experience soothing and relaxing. Now to begin!

Head Spinning. Feeling light headed. Almost a natural high! Wow! That was my initial reaction when I first had my nicotine high. It felt so good that I exclaimed “Ang Sarap Mag Yosi”! But then again it was temporary. Just like most of the things that you encounter. With respect to the emotional, physical and mental aspects of life. We usually indulge in this pseudo fantasies and realities, which give us a sense of satisfaction and completeness. But do we have the power to decipher which among these so-called “Placebo Effects” are real?

Lets begin with the basic situations:

Example 1:

Boy just separated with the love of his life. After enduring so much pain (which he himself caused after cheating on his girl) the guys finally realizes it’s time to move on and go soul searching (“hmmm that wasn’t a very good term to use). He then finds Girl no 1. AT first Girl no.1 seemed to be the spitting image (at least physically of his past girlfriend and he struggles shaking off mental hallucinations that both of them are the same girl (i.e. “I see you in her” effect). After finally mustering the strength to face his worst fears he finally realized that girl no.1 is the one who made him forget about his ghostly haunting. He was so happy and satisfied, that he got his sense of “caring” back.

He himself was convinced that this girl was the one that triggered that “letting go effect” slowly but surely he was falling in love again. It was nice, tense and exciting. Similar to a pre-roller coaster dip. Anticipating, hoping that nothing could go wrong. You have the whole situation under control, until the inevitable happens. Uncertainty kicks in and indecisiveness disrupts all harmony. What was once a smooth playing sonata transformed into a barrage of screeches and howls. You tried to make things right (well basically both of them) but in the end things don’t work out. Boy is misunderstood. Girl can’t step away from the shadows of someone (an enlighten knight maybe hehehe peace).

So to finally end things guy tries to step away and stop living a dream. A constant one. It sucks sometimes when people think that you ask something in return. Guy needs a respite from all of this s*^t! Being caught in this situation is something that other guys would readily reject, but for this boy it is something worth trying. It’s better to lose than be futile. It is nicer to fight for something and failing rather than do it with no certain results.

Conclusion. Guy provided space for the girl in order to let things settle down.

Example 2:

Boy just went thru a lot of hullabaloo concerning his love life. Months of frustration over failed dating and finding the correct person. Beforehand he was caged with the thought of falling in-love again with the one who got away. Stormed by vendetta and hate, it slowly consumed him inside and out. One day he decided to face his demons and confront his worst fears. Boy finds “the right girl” falls in-love and in the end he still end up being divided. He finally decided to let go of the one who got away and decided to pursue the latter. Everything was well but in the end it was not. He ends another chapter enlightened. Sometimes it’s worth to just sit down with another individual. Talk things over. But of course it is better when both of you don’t have that what we call excess baggage or other unfinished business. In the end either sila yung epal or ikaw ang umeepal.

Conclusion: Guy Faced Reality!

Example 3

Guy finally wraps up one of the most complicated equations in his life. Boy relaxes gets back at work and tried to sort one out again. This time it’s really complicated (well maganda siguro yung hitsura nung equation) coz he doesn’t want to have the kind of equation he had before. He started working on this new equation. Taking his time, doing the right steps, using the correct formula and finally realizes that it pays off. No unfinished business between them or in their bags. No overly romantic dates and less drama. That’s more like it. You ask more questions before doing your move. It’s clearer and gives more progress. You assess every step, every move and every reaction, and if your patient enough, then all of your efforts doesn’t go unheralded. Yes this boy is very happy right now. Thanks for a very good advice form his no.1 antagonist (his tongue is usually as sharp as his name suggest hehehe). Lower to zero expectations make the experience better. Things unfold the natural way. The more we ask and the more we wait then better things would come our way.

Slowly but surely this boy is very glad how things are working out, the last 3 days were fast and great. The boy made sure that everything was clear and that he or she was not just looking for another escape route. Coffee and a pack of Marlboro Ultra Lights Bridge a lot of gap, and the skyline over at the Viewing Deck of the Starbucks Shangri-La branch gave the experience a wonderful effect. And who says that happiness escapes those who seek it. This time I am playing my cards carefully. No more all-ins and bluffs ,just the facts. Win or Lose at least then game is fair and no one’s hiding any cards. I wont say “eto na” or ok na. Keep on doing the right things and malay mo….

Conclusion: Guy is Falling in love, for real...walang sabit

Well a couple of thanks for the following guys….

Lance and Ram-For providing humor and words of wisdom (crooked at some point , hehehe) and my monthly moniker.

Jesy and Sarah- For the wonderful contribution (the one who got away)

Caco-For the Siakol Lyrics!

Ghost and Ellie-thank you guys. For making me learn new things!

Wag Mong Isipin Yon Chords by Siakol, www.Ultimate-Guitar.Com

H'wag mong isipin yon

Hindi ka no'n mahal Tulay:

Alam mo nang niloloko ka n'ya

Pero nagbubulag-bulagan ka

Hindi mo ba napapansin

Nakekengkoy ka na

(same chords on 1st stanza mga bosing)

H'wag manghinayang don may mas babagay paIgala-gala mo lang ang mga mata

Tulay 2:(same chords on tulay 1 mga bosing)

At kung sa pag-ihip nitong hangin

Dama mo na ikaw ay napuwing

Probema mo't suliranin Aking aalisin

Koro:

Tumingin ka sa iba at iyong makikita

Yung di ka iiwan di na mag-iisa

Tumingin ka kung saan

Kikislap ang 'yong mga mata

At gugulong ka sa katatawa

Ha!ha!ha! masaya

'Di ka na mangangamba

Hindi ka na magmumukhang tanga

At kung manhid ka kasi mahal mo pa s'ya

Naku umayos ka marami pang iba

Repeat Intro, Chorus

Marami pang iba......3x

Confusion Post!

2006-11-14T19:17:00.000+08:00

Give Me A Break!
Well nothing much just wanna post a simple wallpaper I made for someonw. Ok mamaya na uli serious post! Thanks for posing for me Diane. Isn't she pretty? Hehehe! Wala lang!

I hate this week!

2006-11-09T08:21:00.000+08:00

The one that almost got away."

Courtesy of Jesy Jopio and Sarah Carolino!

Patamaan daw ba ako! Hahahaha!

In your life you'll take note of a lot of people. Ones with whom you shared comething special, ones who will always mean something.

There's the one you first kissed, the one you first loved, the one you lost your virginity to, the one you put on a pedestal, the one you're with... and the one that got away. Who is the one that got away? I guess it's that person with who everything was great, everything was perfect, but the timing was just wrong. There was no fault in theperson, there was no flaw in the chemistry, but the cards just didn't fall the right way, I suppose.

I believe in the fact that ending up with someone, finding a longtime partner that is, does not lie merely in the other person. I can actually argue that an equal part, or maybe even the greater part, has to do with the matter of timing. It has to do with you being ready to settle down and commit to someone in a way that goes beyong the little necesities of giddy romance.

How often have you gone through it, without even realizing it? When you're not ready to commit in that mature manner, it doesn't matter who you are with, it just doesn't work. Small problems become big; inconsequentials become deal breakers simply because you're not rady and it shows, It's not that you and the person you're with are no good; it's just that it's not yet right, and little become the flashpoint of that fact.

Then one day you're ready. You really are. And when this happens you'll be ready to settle down with someone.He or she may not be the most perfect, they might not be the brightest star of romance to ever have burned in your life, but it'll work because you're ready. It'll work because it's the right time and you'll make it work, And it'll make sense, it really will.

So that day comes when you're finally making sense of things, and you find yourself to be a different person. Things are different , your approach is different, you finally understand who you are and want you want, and you've become ready because the time ha truly arrived. And mind you, there's no telling when this day will come. Hopefully you're single but you could be in a long-term relationship, you called be married with three kids, it doesn't matter. All you know is that you've changed , and for some reason, the one that got away, is the first person you think about.

You'll think about them because you'll wonder, "What if they were here today?" You'll wonder, "What if we were together now, with me as I am and not as I was?" That's what the one that got away is. The biggest "What if?" you'll have in your life.

If you're married you'll just have to accept the fact that the one that got away, got away. Believe me, no matter how fairy tale you think your marriage is, this can happen to the best of us. But hopefully you're mature enough to realize that you're already with the one you're with and this is just another test of your commitment, one which will just strengthen yoiur marriage when you get past it. Sure, you'll think about him/her every so often, but its alright. It's never nice to live with a "Might have been," but it happens.

Maybe the one that got away is the one who's already married. In which case it's the same thing. You just have to accept and know that your memories of that person will probably bring a nice little smile to your lips in the future when you're old and gray and reminiscing.

But if neither of that is the case, then its different. What do you do if its not yet too late? Simple.. find him, find her. Because the very existence of a "One that got away" means that you'll always wonder, what if you got that one?

You might drop in from out of nowhere and it won't make a difference. If the timing is finally right, it'll all just fall into place somehow and you know, I'm thinking, it would be a great feeling, in the end, to be able to say to someone, "Hey you, you're the one that almost got away."

Enduring Solace-WIth Beer and Vodka! Wee!

2006-11-06T16:40:00.000+08:00

Enduring Solace-WIth Beer and Vodka! Wee!

First of all Im excited coz I'll be coming back to work by tommorow morning. I got the go signal from my doctor a while ago and cant w8 to go on the floor once more.

Now back to some serious issues. Ano pa bang masasabi ko. The past 6 days was one whirlwind ride for my thoughts and emotions. This is what I call a "tug of war" effect. Treat it this way. May ubo ka kaya kailangan mong mag bisolvon kahit mapait. May tumor ka pero kahit delikado kailagan mong magp-opera. Di ba ang hirap. Bottomline sa lahat ng mga tao sa paligid ko magpakatotoo tayo. Hindi porke masakit hindi mo na aaminin o pangangatawanan.

Ngayon sa mga nakakakilala sakin, alam nyo na siguro kung ano ibig sabihin ko. Yes kinain ko mga sinsabi ko noon. Ang hirap kasi kung maglolokohan lang tayong lahat. So ako ang desisyon ko eh to take the challenge. Ano man hirap o bagay susubukan ko. Petty, pero totoo. Sigh. Pero ang totoo niyan masaya ako na nalilito.

At sa multo na dumalaw sakin, wag mo akong pipilitang mamili. Nakapamili na ako kaya sorry na lang. It's the truth. Maubos man ang mga taong magbibigay ng prayers para sa kaluluwa mo (ghost ka nga diba?) may isa pa ring Orc/Oaf/Troll na hahanap sayao.

Well di mo ako kaaway. Alam ko na dimo ako nakikilala tulad ng dati. Pero try mo lang,baka nagkakamali ka!

Thanks nga pala sa mga tao na nag post sa blog ko for the past week! Baet baet nyo naman! So mamaya na lang 1:30 AM. Babalik na ako!

One more thing. Para sa ghost may ginawa pala akong wallpaper. May message na nakalagay dun. Just click on the link to download and apply it as wallpaper temporarily. Hindi yun mababasa unless gawinmong wallpaper or ma zoom mo siya.

Respeto lang sa mga tukmol na mag da-download at pag tri-tri-pan (kahit ogag mga barkada ko lalo na si Lance di niya gagawin yun). Respeto lang!

So guys Hanggang dito na lang at ang bago ko nga pa lang national anthem nung nagkasakit ako at walang ginawa kundi uminom (thanks Vodka and Beer0 ay walang iba kungdi ang napakagandang awitin ng bandang itchyworms ang Beer! Bow!

Thought for the Day-"Let the Unfairness of the World, Keep You Motivated and Fighting".

Beer

by: Itchywowrms

Nais kong magpakalasing Dahil wala ka na Nakatingin sa salamin At nag-iisa Nakatanim pa rin ang gumamelang Binalik mo sakin Nang tayo’y maghiwalay Ito’y katulad ng damdamin ko Kahit buhusan mo ng beer ayaw pang mamatay

Giliw, wag mo sanang limutin Ang mga araw na hindi sana naglaho Mga anak at bahay nating pinaplano Lahat ng ito’y nawala Nung iniwan mo ako Kaya ngayon

Chorus:

Ibuhos na ang beer Sa aking lalamunan Upang malunod na ang puso kong nahihirapan Bawat patak anong sarap Ano ba talagang mas gusto ko Ang beer na to o ang pag-ibig mo

III

Nais kong magpakasabog Dahil olats ako Kahit ano hihithitin Kahit tambucho Kukuha ako ng beer at ipapakulo sa kaldero Lalanghapin ang usok nito Lahat ay aking gagawin upang hindi ko na isiping nag-iisa na ako

(Repeat Chorus)

Giliw, wag mo sanang limutinAng mga araw na hindi sana naglahoMga anak at bahay nating pinaplanoLahat ng ito’y nawalaNung iniwan mo akoKaya ngayon

(repeat ChoRus)

A welcome Haunting....

2006-11-03T16:46:00.000+08:00

Proven Wrong....A welcome Haunting

Hello Guys! It's been a week already and Im still sick with chicken pox. Yes it was just recent when i was infected by my officemate Eric (hehe dont worry Eric tigas kasi ng ulo ko). Well I've experienced a lot of things before going on my PLA (Prolonged Leave of Absence). I met up with a very unusual ghost from my past, It was haunting but at the same time very very soothing. It is the type of ghost that make you get off the road of everyday life. It was like this four years ago. But then again this time it's different. As much as I want to hold the ghost in my arms, it simply just wont fall thruogh me. I was sadden knoing that this time it was different. The Ghost to me to places and talked about things form the past. I wanted it to stay, but there are other things in it's mind. But then again I was glad. Cause it was the first time the ghost listened to my words. All the hate and pain was stripped out of my body. And all I could say is that I am willing for whatever the ever "Higher Power" has in-store for me.

Before we parted , I promised the Ghost that whatever happens I ill always pray and be on it's side. It was hesitant but a slight uncertainty in it's voice made me worry. Idont want to speculate, but I just pray for the best. I only told it, to always do the right thing. I also told that it deserved more blessings and prayers . I am pained that I am capabale of doing all these things for this entity, but I was powerless cause somebody else was tasked to do it. As we parted, my mind took two days to settle down. I am still cconfused, but this time I was able to handle it.

Things may not always come your way when you force it. But youll be surprised how fate swings it's favor on those who wait. Now who says I wasnt blessed...I am. As for the ghost always remeber, all I wanted is your eternal peace. If others cant do it...then there is always one person willing to join you or someone you can haunt for eternity. For you are my Kiang Shi---A welcome Haunting!

P.S. Thank you for everyone who sent their "Get Well Soons". To team Hyeprion, Congratulation Guys, and hopefully this is just one of the many achievements that the team's gonna attain in the future. I am climbing back and is hoping to join you again in a week. I miss you guys, And to the constant patrons of this blog, thanks for keeping my cbox filled with messages. Im gonna return the favor guys. Thanks. And to Ellie-Hime. Just follow what your haert tells you and evrything will follow. DOnt worry about me, I welcome your decision and I thank you for the privileges. Were still friends.

And as for the ghost....May Logic ka naman, at may puso din.

"Let all the infairness of this world keep me going and motivated...."

Somethings Never Change!

2006-10-31T01:22:00.000+08:00

"Some Things Never Change"

Remember how it felt when you first really fell in love. Yes most people fall in love once or twice. But there really is one that just wont let you rest. That irritating feeling that consumes you whenever you try to sleep, or when you find yourself idle, with nothing to do and your dog lazily taking a nap by your lap.

Ok. Whets up with me. I shouldn’t be talking about these things since I already closed a chapter in this book and made everything clear. Lets use one scene from one of my favorite series Dr. House. (I wont explain the setup so anyone who is familiar with the characters I say congratulations for you can basically decipher the meaning of this post, well for the others I’m' sorry you have to read on or leave a message at my cbox). In this scene "House" was literally left stranded in an Airport (due to some bad weather) and was forced to stay in the Airport hotel with their Hospital Attorney.

The Conversation went on a very nice turn when both of them came dangerously close from one another and the most memorable lines (This is Just My Opinion) from the series ran a cold feeling down my spine. The lines went:

You know what Greg (House), do you know how good Korean Curry is (I forgot the Dish Used). You like it so much that you virtually eat the stuff almost everyday in your life. Until one day somebody offered you Pasta. It gave you the chance to taste and feel the difference from the curry that you love so much. The same way you did with the Curry. You forget about the Curry for such a long time, but in the end you still realized how you missed and loved Curry. Then you tell yourself that you don’t want anything in the world but Curry. Cause you love it so much whatever happens.

Another scene that I would use was when Nairobi (Jada Pinkett Smith) and Morpheus (Lawrence Fishburne) went inside the Matrix to layout the final assault against the machine. When the Nebuchadnezzar went missing council of elders requested two ships to volunteer and search for the missing Morpheus and his crew. Nairobi was one of the Captains who answered to the call. This infuriated Commander Lock (Nairobi’s Fiancée) and when questioned about her decision Nairobi simply answered “Some Things Never Change.

Now what’s my point here? Basically people tend to change physically, mentally and spiritually. But there are things you treasure so much that not even extreme hate or anger could erase it. Just like what happened on “House”. She felt that she was having too much (this could work vice versa also people) curry. But in the end she realizes that she just loves curry and cant get enough of it.

Well sometimes it just hits you dead center when you feel this way. Call it martyrdom (according to a cute friend) or dedication/foolishness. But hey some things Never Change. And I’m glad that they don’t. Why Cause I’ll be living one big lie! Forget the past; forget whatever my friends or people say. Some things don’t change and I’m proud to say that my decision is still the same.

I want to find lost “HEART” and I’m going long term for it.

Thanks for squeezing the truth out of me. And I’ll do it again and again.

To God almighty, thanks. I leave everything in your hands.

To my friends and Family I’m sorry. This is one thing I can’t deny.

“Because some things never Change”

2006-10-29T03:24:00.000+08:00

Song of the Day!
LSS Ako today! Sobrang nakakatuwa!

Mahirap Magmahal Ng Syota Ng Iba
Apo Hiking Society

Mahirap talagang magmahal ng syota ng iba
Hindi mo mabisita kahit na okey sa kanya
Mahirap! oh, mahirap talaga
Maghanap na lang kaya ng iba.

Ngunit kapag aking nakita ang kanyang mga mata
Nawawala ang aking pagkadismaya
Sige lang, sugod lang, o bahala na!
Bahala na kung magkabistuhan pa.

RefrainI-dial mo ang number sa telepono
Huwag mong ibigay ang tunay na pangalan mo
Pag nakausap mo s’ya, sasabihin sa ‘yo
“tumawag ka mamaya, nandito’ng syota ko.”

Mahirap talaga ang magmahal ng iba
O, sakit ng ulo, maniwala ka
Ngunit kahit ano pa’ng sabihin nila
Iwanan siya’y ‘di ko magagawa.

Mahirap humanap ng ibaO, sakit ng ulo, maniwala ka
Ngunit kahit ano pa’ng sabihin nilaIwanan siya’y ‘di ko magagawa.

Iwanan siya’y ‘di ko magagawa
Iwanan siya’y ‘di ko magagawa
Iwanan siya’y ‘di ko magagawa

Pero Mahal ko pa rin Siya! Hahaha! Hirap talga ng Buhay! Ecnal Reply Ka naman diyan!

2006-10-27T09:14:00.000+08:00

Sa Uulitin Kaibigan!

Im very very infuriated right now. Hindi ko alam kung bakit kailangan pang magkahiwalay ang mga magkakatropa para lamng masabing and isang bagay ay gaganda o uunlad. Napakasakit mang sabihin pero totoong nakakainis ang pagbabago.

Una nalaman ko na mawaal na ang ibang kaibigan ko dito sa floor. Bakit dahil ililipat sila sa ibang department. Oo sobrang hindi ko alam pero katwiran nila sistema lang. So here we go. Sa mga kaibigan (Frank, Ged, Mike, Loid) kahit anong mangayari pare kaibigan pa rin kayong tunay.

Walang iwanan laging magkakasama pare! Thanks sa lahat sana magkatagpo pa tayong muli!

2006-10-22T22:07:00.000+08:00

Fear Factor

Well 2 days lang naman akong nagkasakit. And sobrang nakakinis. Well sorry for the fly and her queen on my cbox its not because of your post guys. Like what I said la na bang bago? Kantahin natin ng sabay sabay (Para ka namang sirang plaka....paulit ulit!). Unang una sobrang nakakasira ng momentum. Two more days fore week ending then you get sick....No. 2 Ok na ako about Ellie. Nagusap na kami and were clear. So kung anao mang damage ang gagawin mo eh either alam na niya or no use so sorry na lang langaw (tinawag mo akong kalabaw) ang cute no yung lanagaw ka date yung mascot ng milk gold!. No.3 Di ko pa rin alam ang result ng blood culture ko kaya medyo nakaka praning. Im still contemplating wether to put the laydown on one particular issue or mas matitimpi ng puso ko dahil di naman ako galit sa iba. Well itutulog ko na muna after ng shift. Well yun lang naman sa ngayon. Gusto ko pa mag post pero na miss ko lang sila Ranque at Achaval (Kahit na inaapi nyo ako....joke). Okies tama na muna ang birahan tonight. Im in a good mood and no ones gonna ruin it ano man sabihin mo! Die trying fast mouth. I dont want to be bad but for you I will. Dont go pick on leftovers if you want to make a name for yourself! Sorry birahan daw eh! O ranque Binatukan mo na naman Ako!

2006-10-18T08:32:00.000+08:00

Eternal Raid

A year ago I remember when Cory and me were also having the same situation. Everything is on the rocks; complication is the keyword to every situation that we do. I could almost feel the very same thing here. In fact I do have the power to either smite or keep away.

But I am not any Jerk. I’m not a rabid piranha who goes nibbling on a dreaded wound in order to show supremacy or even disable the competition. I am not a jerk. Id rather feels that I’ve loved someone rather than feeling guilty about me being the reason why two lovers got separated or departed.

All I can say is please take care of Ellie. I wont feel ashamed of telling you that in a short span of time, how much special she was to me. The problem with us guys is complacency. If we feel everything is stable, we tend to lose our edge, and slowly drift back into the shadows. How silly it is when you yourself read something about another guy's thought about your special one, then tell yourself "oops yes I do love her that much". Please recognition should not come from things that are external. It should come from you. All of this feelings and expressions should not come from another man's provocation or message, but deep inside of you.

I may not be a perfect man nor a very blessed individual, but I know when to step up the gas and make her feel as if it's always our time together. You guys still have each other and don’t give me crappy statuses as "its complicated and Domestic Partnership". Grow and mend things not make it sloppy as Jell-O. Geesh! I would exchange everything before to have a chance to make everything right and get her back...but I failed. You guys are lucky you’re still both at arms reach.

Enough drama and disregard all nuisance (other guys, girls) shut them off! To hell with them. It doesn’t matter if it's a friend or someone from the past just slam the door on them! Even me. Focus on one another and mend it without thinking of what others may say. It takes two to tango and don’t exchange partners, not even on a single step.

I lay my sword down and hope that you guys fix this as soon as possible. I know how painful it is for a man to loose the girl that he loved the most. And it's worst when you realize it late in the process!

And this is a very serious demand form me. Take good care of her or else! I mean it. I am not a fighter but I don’t stand down! Don’t be complacent. And for Ellie...always make sure to point the gun and shoot!

Saya Cinta Amu Ellie!

...As the snow passes away, I stood up holding my princess by the hand. I then carry her to a distant land where her prince awaits. I stabbed the prince thee by the shoulder waking him from his deep slumber. Telling him "Be-Prince-Like or the last thing you'll see is the tip of my sword". I slowly lay the princess down his arms, as I bid farewell to the glorious being laying motionless by his hands. I throw away my sword and slowly walk by the window...smiling. Thank you Princess for the "Once Empty Strider" has once again felt life. A sudden gush, but enough to push me through unto my next journey....

Sayonara Ellie-Princess! Always By the Shadows....Always here never gone.

Here's My Song For You!

Do I need A reason-A guy doesnt need anything more than the sight of the woman he cares the most drift along his eyes and make time stop!

Today when I saw you

I knew it was just like the first time

When you met my eyes

I came closeAnd I felt like the first time

To hold back my fear and feel you so near

I've never been this far before

To hold back my fearand feel you so near

I'm scared of falling into deep this time

Do I need a reason to tell you why

I'm singing you this song

Do I need a reason to show you that

I know where I belong

Whenever I am weary

I lean onthis feeling that I have

I am so much stronger now

Thankful, yes I amToday

I'll renounce them,the doubts and the fears

I've been nursing

I'll fly like a moth to the flame

and I'll feel like the first time

To hold back my fearand let you come near

I've never been this far before

To hold back my fearand let you come near

I'm ‘fraid of loosing and still I go

Well Does this mean im stuck with Jerome Again?

Sheesh!

Snowbound Princess

2006-10-10T16:08:00.000+08:00

My Snow Bound Princess

-A Refelcetion By GAngelesphi

For Elie-

As the sun goes down from the horizon, I see the sudden falling of the leaves. Cherry blossoms painting may path with the soothing colors of pink.

Paused and I wondered, is such beauty only seen thru this solace of moments. When will I ever find that Beauty that fully captivitaes both mind and soul.

As I continue my journey I see you walking form the horizon. As the winter snow pass my sight, you offer thy hand and beckoned me to follow. Was it my imagination or was there really a princess asking for my presence

And as I run through the deep snow, my heart raced as I laborly went for your warm soft hands. Only to find emptiness and nothingness around me.

As the tears rolled down my cheek, I suddenly realize that my princess was never gone. But will always be inside my heart no matter what.

I stood up, and there you were holding my head away form the snow, telling me that everything is alright.

Always here....never gone

Gian

MOB RULE

2006-10-10T15:35:00.000+08:00

Thru Thick and Thin

I never imagined that I would be inside this once familiar predicament. I've told you on my last post that I was once again able to find the right person whom I’m ready to take care and treat specially in the following days. It was a very wonderful moment knowing that there she is right in front of you telling her all the things that you kept for weeks. A special day that started with a certain smile and an endless exchange of thoughts.

An inevitable dawn that almost drowned my heart with the utmost happiness and fulfillment. A sudden move almost tore this moment out of its foundation, but was quickly mended and forged it back to strength. But like all other dangers in life. There was always a major shock after the tremors were felt.

Life or death. That’s the way I’m going to describe the situation. Yes I love and I know that this girl was not a mere result of longing or missing your ex. It wasn’t a feeling of having to have a girlfriend in order to satisfy your ego. It was a matter of seeing from that person, unique and uncanny characteristics that makes her really special. Elie I won’t be holding back anymore. I’m writing this because just like what you’ve said, you don’t want to go or even lose me as a friend. The same goes here. It's not them that run this connection. It is us. And I’m also afraid of loosing you. I am here Elie I’m here to finally live up to the promise that I gave you. I’m here to vindicate the honesty that you’ve asked of me. And I won’t let anyone steal us of this moment. Not a soul.

I’ve never crossed the line with anyone at work, and I'll never will. They can take away everything even the respect and pride out of me....They can talk behind my back and forever mock me, but it would take more than that to make me move or give out.

I promised you something yesterday, before you went for your class. I’m here and will stay inn the shadows just as you’ve requested. Well work it through I promise. Finish everything that you need to finish, and I'll still be there in the other end waiting for you...

It's been quite some time since I said this line...
Saya Cinta Amu-Elie

Guys please pray for us...so we can pass this storm together. Thanks for believing in me...you now who you guys are. An as for those who can’t seem to keep their noses to themselves...Die trying!

Hime-Princess

2006-10-05T02:56:00.000+08:00

Hime-Princess

When I first got to this Job, I wasn't expecting anything special (love-wise or relationship wise). Yeah lots of nice girls walking in and out of the busy "floor area". After failing on my first attempt I was on my way on becoming a full pledge Bachelor for years to come, until faith plays a very wonderful trick on you. You suddenly find yourself around someone whom you didn’t expect to have the same impact or influence in your life.

Very uncanny, she dominantly resembles someone who’s been associated with me for years. She sports the same spontaneity, childish glee and the ever-sweet nature that seem to evade me for the past year. Inspiring, yet convincingly forbidden, but then again being honest does have its advantages.

Should I continue folding or should I all in for the count. Nah. I am happy seeing her here. And I’m willing to check, in order not to spoil the moment. And to you “Mystery Woman” hope your radiance never fail to imbue me with the happiness you’ve been giving me!

Are You Cold?

Napaso Ka ba?

Wee!

Tiger's Strike Back!

2006-10-04T09:45:00.000+08:00

Animo Sto Tomas-Growling Tiger's Pride!

THE TIGER

TIGER, tiger, burning bright In the forests of the night, What immortal hand or eye Could frame thy fearful symmetry? In what distant deeps or skies Burnt the fire of thine eyes? On what wings dare he aspire? What the hand dare seize the fire? And what shoulder and what art Could twist the sinews of thy heart? And when thy heart began to beat, What dread hand and what dread feet? What the hammer? What the chain? In what furnace was thy brain? What the anvil? What dread grasp Dare its deadly terrors clasp? When the stars threw down their spears, And watered heaven with their tears, Did He smile His work to see? Did He who made the lamb make thee? Tiger, tiger, burning bright In the forests of the night, What immortal hand or eye Dare frame thy fearful symmetry?

It's been 8 years since the Tiger's Growl was heard over the plain known as UAAP. I still remember the good old' days when the ever bright colors of black gold, black white was still being waved all across the Araneta coliseum with some of the best Goldies parading across the the court. From the sensational sweep, the astonishing back to back and the very rare three-peat. With the likes of Rey Evangelista, Rudolf Belmonte, Siot Tanquincen, Rudolf Belmonte, Estong Ballesteros, Edmund Reys, Gerald Francisco, Dennis Espino and more, the tigers has clawed their way back as contender.

I still remember the last cahmpionship way back in 1998 when the Tiger's were ousted by a last three pointer by Dino Aldeguer at the cuneta astrodome. It started the Tiger's title drought of sort. * Years passed by and the players came and go and the ever-mighty Captain Tiger- Aric Del Rosario failed to bring the Goldies back in their former glory.

After a change in the Coaching Staff and after a complete overhaul in the Tiger's bench and front-liners, no one expected the resilience and ferocity that they displayed during the 69th season. After being seeded one of the lower tier players, the Tiger's even had a 2-4 Card during the first round. And when the second round concluded the sudden surge of the Tiger's hunger for winning re-emerged. From an individual's standpoint no one could expect the Tiger's to even survived the first round. With most of them playing 1-3 positions. The Tiger's main offensive behemoth "Cruz" made a big difference. The young Center Forward plowed thru the bests of the team's defenses.

During the final four we were even ranked no.4 behind NU and UE. With an EX-Champion and Powerhouse Teams (Ateneo and UE) it was an uphill task that the Tiger's finished with a bang. After disposing of the Recto Based warriors, the Tigers went on to forge a classic showdown that would go down the history books. With a heart breaking loss in Game 1 the Tiger came back Clawing and Biting their way, tearing the Eagles apart with an impressive 16 point beating of the Kalayaan based dribblers. Two days after the stage was set for an unforgettable Final Game 3 that went to an overtime. The dramatic finale showed the Tiger's true strength of actually grinding it until the fat lady sings. As the final buzzer sounded I cant help but be overwhelmed and be teary eyed as the whole floor of the Araneta Coliseum was swarming with UST's Black, Gold and White clad supporters.

During the final hymn a nostalgic sense of pride was felt by everyone especially me. The King's are back in their rightful places and the Dynasty shall rise again!

Animo Tigers! Beat Ateneo!

Black Gold Black White

Whack A Week!

2006-09-25T11:16:00.000+08:00

Whack A week!

Ok eto na po ako ulit after two weeks of no posting!

Well I just want to thank all of the guys who posted their messages on my cbox. Ok it’s been on hell of a week of constant designing printing and running errands for my bosses here at AOL. Super as in buti na lang kinaya ng powers ko. From designing our programs ad materials to the point of making a tambiolo, going to Vince's inuman sessions, Shift GA and Meet the Family events, I would say that took a lot away form me. Imagine staying for hours sa office (final tally ng OT=32 hours, total sleep=8).

Now back to business. Wala pa rin akong gf at wala na rin akong nililigawan. I'll let her heal muna then try again some other day. I know what she's going through and mas masakit talaga pag ikaw ang naiwan. But then again alam ko naman na super strong niyang tao. SO kung sino ka man I know you'll be able to survive this.

Magic Updates:

I joined the PRE-CON Time Spiral game and won 3/3 games after my dada called my phone and asked me to go home. Well the new expansion gave me back a lot of memories and old school feel for the cards. I was fortunate enough to grab my first win by casting disintegrate on the 5th turn and winning the game. For the second round I was able to meet Matthew and also played his own sealed deck and almost lost after he pulled up "The Rack" at the start of the game. Fortunately another direct damage made me win the round by playing tribal flames (talk about having five types of lands with a sealed deck). Lastly the last game was won by one of the legends I got form my two packs (Lightning Angel) I was lucky no flyers were around my opponents side so I was able to summon and have the angel deal mega damage! Later that night my dealer informed me that my Booster Box Set is coming next week and I cant wait for the cards that would come out form that set (A lot of Cards were pre ordered and I’m kind of excited Coz I could actually earn 2.5 x the amount the box itself).

Misc:

Alam nyo ba na may kamukha yung ex ko dito from another Program. Grabe its so freaky kasi nung makita niya yung picture ng ex ko, pati siya nagulat! Hehe. Nakakailang lang kasi talagang magkamukha sila. And she's even joking na puwede naman akong friend (hahaha natatawa talaga ako) pero every time she jokes talagang sobrang nakakilang and it's too far from comfort). Well got to live with it. No.2 may bago na rin pala akong aso. Cram ang pangalan niya (well named after you know who). Beagle siya lalake. Ironic diba. Nangyari na to eh. By the way natatawa rin pala ako. Kasi sabi sakin ng brakada ko buti pa daw ako may time kasi siya wala na. Sabi ko oo nga. Dami ko ngang movie passes (any movie hanggang 2007) la naman akong date. hehehe! Oks lang. Bilog nga naman ang mundo kasi basta...hehehe!

Well happy din ako kasi pumunta sila mama and papa nung family day. It was so weird kasi this was the first time that we eventually had an activity (besides Solar's Events) wherein involved directly and parents. Well so glad lang kasi at least close "ako" sa magulang ko. Negative side lang kasi Iv'e been having lots and lots of stressful nights. I don’t know if this is pressure pero bakit parang ang lakas pa rin ng kutob ko na I haven't seen the last of "Choi". Well I've been dreaming about "it" more and more each night. Freaky pero please I want that thing to stay out of my mind. Not beacuse I no longer "love it", but because I still care siguro. Mahirap talaga pero kung kailan naman mas capable ako in all aspects saka naman hindi ko ma-i-apply. Well sana lang. Pero Nandito lang naman ako eh.

I aint cutting the privileges, I aint pulling the help line. Pero in-case maubusan ang scarecrow then nandito naman akong kalabaw to provide. Hehehe. Ok Sige got to log-in again! Ciao!

Jam Trip:

Some songs that stir me up every time I hear them:

1.) So Sick-Swak na SwakHalf Crazy-Bakit Kasi Ganun!

Misty Glass Window

2006-09-15T13:55:00.000+08:00

Misty Eyed

Sigh, what’s up? Surprised? Yeah it’s only been a day and yet I’m back writing again. After an 11 hour overtime last wed, i am back again with a whooping 8 for today. I just finished my deliverables for blitz, and I’m currently doing another set for the same event. Well wondering about the title of this blog? That’s exactly what I am right now.

Talk about every bad news crashing and burning your heart down to ashes. Well don’t worry I aint mad or anything. I think fate just pinched me a little bit too hard this time. I haven’t cried for months and didn’t expect it to come in a day where everything was considered perfect.

Lets just put it this way. What would an average Joe feel when his ex-gf already had a bf for four months and all of his hunches were correct (Don’t worry Cory I am not mad, and I don’t mean anything). Then the Girl that made your heart go racing and feel a sudden sigh down your throat tells you, not yet ready maybe some other time...but thanks anyway.

Hehehehehe. Yes I am taking it lightly. I aint mad, only sad. Well tough luck. Let me just wade it out and just continue keeping myself busy. More distractions, the better.

Well thanks Guys! Hehe! Ika nga nila sa Poker (FOLD!)

P.S. Caco thanks for the Hidetsugu and the other Rare Cards.

Parade of Roses Halo Halo ATBP!

2006-09-14T08:14:00.000+08:00

Hello there! First of all I welcome you again to my Blogsite! It’s been a month since my last post and all I can say is that everything’s been good. I wish Cory and her new boyfriend all the best in the world (don’t worry guest I am sincere this time). I’m thankful for all the blessings that I am getting. First of all there are a lot of stuff lot of stuff just raring to be posted here so expect a lot of reading. Second you may have noticed a change in my blog's layout. And a lot of surprises in-store for everyone. Okidoki! Lets get the ball rolling!

Things have been going great for my job here in AOL Tech. I’m glad that I am meeting all of my metrics, and hopefully be promoted or better yet be a CSS in the future. Im glad that I was able to make use of my skills for my superiors, when they asked me to design the promotional materials for the AOL Blitz-Disney Extravaganza for both the FPS and AOL Tech Queues.

Each change of shift presents a new challenge for me. More Irate callers in the morning, less avail time and less surveys. It kind of makes it tough since the night shift was far more comfortable and less stressful shift for all of us. But hey that’s ok. I’m really looking forward for better things here at AOL. I really love my time here and of course with my friends and.....

Well I wont lie, I’m in-love with someone right now. Hey! I know its kind of weird me saying this, but hey I’m just being honest and I really don’t want myself keeping something that needs to be revealed. Well she’s one of my floor mates here at Tech. I was hesitant before but I told myself it’s only a matter of time before I muscle the strength to approach her. At first it was awkward but as expected she was nice naman. Kahit na ka-teammate pa siya ng barkada ko mahirap pa rin. Well for anyone who knows her then good, but for everyone who don’t, hehehe tune in na lang next time. But I tell you guys, I really like her and sana tuloy tuloy na. Well It's been a while since I gave someone flowers. Nakakilang pero ok lang! Hope she liked it!

her or anything, but then again I'll just play my position and take it on a right pace. I know she'll see this anytime soon, but all I could say is that, I’m not here to drag or take you in a roller coaster ride. Let me just wait around the corner till you say all right. I'll be waiting for your heart to heal, for the pains that we feel need no rushing, but simple waiting and caring will do.

Other Stuff:

Well I just purchased a PSP, and I’m getting a helluva time with it. Music, Games, Pics and Storage all in one package. Talk about an I-Pod topping all of that. And the good thing about it is that a lot of people here on the floor are helping me make the most out of my PSP. (Kudos to Jonathan and John).

Magic business is booming. IM glad that I am back selling a lot of cards and retailing for some of my friends and floor mates. I’m finishing three decks right now. All I need is some additional direct damage cards for my Blood Sword (Red/White Samurai Weenie) and at least two Wrath of God or Final Judgment. As for my Spirit Horde Deck a lot of cards are still needed but hopefully by Saturday I can finish making the deck. I’m currently working on one of the type 2-land destruction card that Ram suggested me to construct. I am currently reading book 1 of Kamigawa (Outlaw) and as far as blocks are considered, this block still ranks no.1 for me.

As for the new Block Time Spiral, I am lucky enough avail of a very special discount (from 5,200 PHP down to 4,000 PHP) for a box of boosters. Good thing about this is that some of the Rare Cards (Teferi and Mishra) are already being reserved in advanced. Hehehe, big bucks again for this month.

As for other stuff, the family is currently busy in preparing for my sister’s wedding this December. Last Sunday a lot of people were asking about “her” and all I could say is that “I don’t know”. It’s kind of hard when you can’t help but face the truth. On the other hand it was really nice when bumped with Haya yesterday. Nagulat ako kasi malapait na siyang ma-under sa sister ko sa dept niya. Talk about luck. Well she has a boyfriend now (I think hehehe), pero the good thing about this one eh friends na kami uli. And I was able to at least eat out with her kasama brothers niya.

I’m also working on my dad’s induction materials this coming October. I’m almost 75% done and I have to finish a lot of ads and still do 1 write up and the photo mosaic for the center page. Also in the itinerary are my dad’s AVP and invitation guide. As for Cory all I can say is that thank you for being a part of my life. Whatever happens to both of us depends on how we handle lives. Good luck Cory and I’m just here in case the going gets tough…as a friend.

Well that’s it for now. A very hectic and busy month ahead of us. And also I want to congratulate Team Hyperion (Yabang) for winning the Drive to 85 Challenge for the month of August. Lets gun for a Sept win!

Advance happy birthday Vince!

To My Wave mates-Thanks
To My team-I'm one hell of a time with you guys
To My Family-Thanks for sticking it with me.
To Cory-Thanks for making me Realize how strong I am
To Caco, Mike and Shine-Solid To!
To Ram and Jerome always my true friends
To Lance Gago ka Joke! Lakas Trip!
To Lui: A very special friend!

To Audz-Thank you for being an Inspiration

Thank You Dr. House

2006-07-31T04:37:00.000+08:00

Well look how funny one obnoxious guy could be.... Well days of the slapstick or what we call toilet humor have been all gone. Laughter nowadays comes in different packages, and that’s how House M.D. is actually making an impact in my life. Putting the statement "Laughter is the best medicine (or sarcasm is the next best thing to laughter)

What makes watching Dr.House an enjoyable and very educational habit? Well he’s one of those “Never Judge a book by its cover” guys. First he doesn’t really give a damn about authority, which makes him unethical, but that directive actually makes him free, meaning whatever decisions he make, wont actually give anyone a reason be blamed (well not everyone sees it that way). And then he has this very irritating “I’m always right “ attitude, which more often than not (I’m waiting for that episode where he actually screws everything up, that would be a classic).

Anyways watching all those animosity between the characters and at the same time being able to work with one another is the definite winning formula for the show. While one would think that the patient is on the verge of actually dying to losing the battle, House comes with the most insidious ideas in order to prove his diagnostics are not just out of the box applications of his medical expertise, but rather an indirect intellectual approach on applied medicine!

Well I’m off to unpacking my second season DVD’s so better head home before my sister grabs them form my room! Adios Amigos.

Dedication works in mysterious ways!

2006-07-24T18:31:00.000+08:00

I was watching the movie "Man in the Iron Mask this Afternoon" and I suddenly came with the idea of writing something about the word, dedication.

We witnessed how Gabriel Burne (Playing D'Artaignan) was willing to defy or even fight three of his friends John Malkovich (Arthos), Jeremy Irons (Aramis), Portos (Gerald De Pardiue) just to protect his king Leonardo di Caprio (Philippe). What drives a person to go against anything just to fulfill his duty.

Dedication (Lat. dedication, from dedicare, to proclaim, to announce), properly the setting apart of anything by solemn proclamation. It is thus in Latin the term particularly applied to the consecration of altars, temples and other sacred buildings, and also to the inscription prefixed to a book, &c., and addressed to some particular person. This latter practice, which formerly had the purpose of gaining the patronage and support of the person so addressed, is now only a mark of affection or regard. In law, the word is used of the setting apart by a private owner of a road to public use.

Well base on the words meaning, dedication is a very complicated trait that one person could possess. A bond that allows one person to either directly or unconsciously serve, protect or even revere at any cost. Humiliation and recognition are sometimes the primary prices one could pay when he or she subjects himself or herself under someone or something. It could either be faith, a deity, a movie star, a superior, and a leader but most of the times it is always the person you love the most. It could act both as a payment for one's offences or a way of taking his or her duty unto another level. People tend to mock this individuals, sometimes asking them what drives them to continue doing all necessary just to show the recipient of the duty how "dedicated" he or she. The recipient may be ignored or even insulted no matter what he or she does. On the other hand people witnessing this gestures would have felt different and extend pity to the individual.

Call it insanity or even futility in one's action, but overall it is more than gut feeling that drives an individual in fulfilling his or her dedication. It may cost him his time, money, sanity and even freedom. The worst thing that could happen is when the recipient doesn’t even recognizes this action. It is a very unfair battlefield out there. As for the people who know me, I beg you not to hate or even think that I myself wasn’t responsible for what am I getting right now? But then again I hope someone pulls me out and tell me when is the right time to give up, coz I aren’t seeing that point in my life as of now.

In the end one question remains...

What would drive another, to stop this so called dedication...or me?

Hate?

Love?

Death?

Only the future holds the answer....

Relationships-Courtesy of Lara Adolfo

2006-07-22T23:44:00.000+08:00

She works in a telecom.

He is reviewing for the board.

They are in the same barkada.

They talk on the phone till 4 am.

He gives her chocolates, flowers and CDs even when there is no occasion.

Their friends are suspecting something.

Bakit sila nagsosolo kapag may overnight?

Why does he hold her close on the dance floor?

Bakit sila magkaholding hands lagi? Sila kaya? "

He hasn't admitted anything," she rants.

"But I let him hug and kiss me.

Parang kami, pero hindi."The "parang kayo, pero hindi" stage.

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Others call it MU or mutualunderstanding. Pseudo-relationships. Pseudo-boyfriends. Flings. Almost like a relationship, but not quite. It is a phase where the persons involved are more than friends, but not quite lovers. Puwedeng may verbal agreement, puwedeng wala. One or both of you may have admitted your feelings, possible ding hindi. You just let your gestures do the talking for you. Walangpormal na ligawan na nangyari. Hindi kayo mag-dyowa. Pero sa kilos niyo, sa mga sinasabi niyo, parang kayo, pero hindi.This kind of "relationship" can happen at different stages for different reasons.

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It can happen after a break-up. You still love each other, and you want to be with each other but you broke up for a reason. And for reasons that you alone know, ayaw niyo na muna magkabalikan.It can also happen before a relationship, iyong pareho kayong nakikiramdam. Possible din na ayaw niyo munang mag-seryoso kaya kunwa-kunwarian lang muna. Testing lang.Puwede ring hindi puwedeng maging kayo kasi isa sa inyo --usually the guy--may ka-relasyon na. Kaya habang hindi pa siya nakikipag-break doon sa girl (sabi niya makikipag-break siya soon pero di naman niya ginagawa), wala muna kayong relasyon para nga naman hindi siya nangagaliwa kasi "hindi naman kayo."

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This pseudo-relationship stage, for a time, can be fun. Pero huwag ka lang mag-e-expect na may patutunguhan kayo kasi wala talagang kasiguraduhan.So bakit ang daming nagse-settle sa ganitong set up ganoong hindi naman sigurado kung may patutunguhan?Iba't ibang dahilan. Puwedeng for fun lang. Puwedeng "buti na iyan kesa wala" Meaning, habang wala pa iyong the real thing, doon muna sa kunwa-kunwarian...For those who are not in a serious relationship, they would think that pseudo-relationship is better than no relationship at all. It would be fun,if all you are after for is that "kilig" feeling.But then I learned that although it was only a pseudo-relationship, the emotions were real. And usually, in this kind of set up, ang babae lagi ang lugi.Una, you can't ask him to commit. Since it's not really a relationship, you can't demand commitment from your partner. Ano ba kayo? May K ka nga ba magpasundo ng hatinggabi?

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You will always be uncertain about your role in his life. You can't expect him to be always there with you. And if you feel jealous of the other girls, you just have to keep it to yourself. Ano ka ba niya para magselos?Pangalawa, what if you fall deeply in love with him? You can't be sure if he feels the same way. Baka nag-a-assume ka lang na mahal ka rin niya. Even if you are dying to tell him you love him, YOU CANT!. Because you're not sure if he'll like it. Baka mapahiya ka lang. This stage will always make you wonder where you are in the relationship. Or if there is a relationship at all.Pangatlo, what if you become attached too much? What if you have invested all your emotions and this man hasn't? What if you remain faithful to him, not entertaining other guys, only to find out that he is seeing other girls?Isa pang downside ng pseudo-relationships, it is short-lived. When a disagreement sets in, or when one of you gets cold, then that would be the end of it. Unlike in a serious relationship, hindi mo alam kung saan ka lulugar sa isang pseudo-relationship. Wala kang pinanghahawakan.

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Kasi sa pseudo-relationship, there is no "us." Meron lang "you and me," hindi "us."Buti sana kung pseudo-pain din lang ang mararanasan mo. Kaso, hindi eh... Real Pain!!! And usually, kahit tapos na ang pseudo-relationship, hindi mo maiwasan umasang one day, may karugtong pa rin iyun. And you will be miserable, hoping to bring back what you used to have, only to find outeventually that the guy is in another pseudo-relationship with somebody else.Ang hirap, ano? You agreed to this kind of set up for fun and then you'd end up hurting yourself in the process.Pero puwede naman maiwasan ang pain eh. Puwede naman na hindi mo muna isipin ang future and just enjoy the feeling, without thinking of the consequences.But if you are certain that you are going to hurt yourself in the process, kailangan mo mamili. You can be happy and live the moment without worrying what would happen next.

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Or you can stop settling with pseudo-relationships and wait for the real thing.Ako nga e, i met this guy na naattached ako ng sobra.. but a friend told me,"cge... go on... kung ok yan sayo!! Pero pag nasaktan ka, huwag kang iiyak-iyak pagkatapos, dahil tatadyakan kita."Ang bottom line lang naman, kung magpapasaya sa iyo, gawin mo. Ihanda mo lang ang sarili mo sa consequence. Dahil ang "parang kayo pero hindi" stage ay bihirang nagiging totoo. Usually, hanggang doon lang siya... almost, but not quite..

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DO YOU ALL AGREE?

An Almost perfect Dayoff!

2006-07-21T23:57:00.000+08:00

First of all let me thank the Lord God Our Father for giving me the best days of my life!

Last Tuesday was the start of my two-day break from operations. And I’m glad that I was able to have two full days, coz last week I was only able to have a 1 day off due to the fact that I eventually came to work on a day wherein am supposed to have my day off (Automatic 6th day tuloy ako).

Well I’m glad that everything is back to normal. My Dad just got discharged form the hospital after being confined there for 4 days due to pneumonia (wag na kasi kayong magyosi kala nyo kasi cool...not!). Well I’m glad that he wasn’t as frustrated as before whenever he gets hospitalized. It was my mom and I who accompanied him on the way home. I’m also glad that he has minimized smoking, and is using an alternative chewable thingy, that could hopefully lessen his smoking habits.

The following day we got to go out and spend much time (me, my mom and papa). Grabe sobrang nakaka miss coz we don’t usually do this anymore. We picked up some of my dad's insurance documents and other sickness claims and went over to my sister's workplace to pick some of the stuff her patients are giving her (bninibiro ko nga ang ate ko na para kang si Buddha laging binibigyan ng alay).

Afterwards I had to go to St. Lukes Hospital in order to have my eyes and my knees checked. And as expected each had a different diagnosis. Lets go start with my knee. Well its been doing great, and my doctor just gave me the go signal to go back to the gym I’ve been waiting for this moment for quite some time, because right from the start I only do cardio and weight training rather than cut on food. He also gave me the go signal to bring back basketball to my regime by March next year.

Now with regards to my eye diagnosis, it didn’t came as promising as the knee check up. I found out various irregularities with my eyes.

1.) I got Astigmatism on both eyes-Well I used to have this condition when I was 16 but I never thought that it would worsen through the years. The right eye has more of the condition that’s why I have to have at least 180-200 grade applied to that eye whenever we do a reading examination. I was so surprised on how much compensation my left eye gives in order to fix my vision.

2.) My doctor suspected that I might be having Glaucoma-like symptoms (this is back-up by the fact that my Grandmother having the same condition a couple of years back, so they consider this one hereditary or genetically passed on. That’s why they had me undergo a Glaucoma Package Test and A Line Vision examination. Well let’s hope for the best for things to turn out well.

3.) Both my eyes have a slightly enlarged vein. (L=0.4, R=0.8) and they said that having this condition is not a very welcoming one.

4.) Lastly I have to wear Glasses again. And how I hate wearing glasses. Well hope I can keep the glasses this time for more than a year and not break or lose it. Hehe, but this time it’s a good pair I know coz, I made sure that it’s not a geeky one.

Now yesterday my mom and I went on our own date. We went to the SSS main office in order to process my partial disability claim (its about time that we get something form the government). And after that we went to one of her favorite Chinese restaurants over in timing to have my favorite bowl of beef brisket/wanton noodles, and a nice plate of mapo tofu, plus the usual cart dumplings. Man you should have seen the amount of food that I had that day. I even managed to top it off by having both a Mango Pudding and Mango-Sago dessert as a take out. Hehehe.

But the most surprising part of the day was when my mom actually asked for Cory. At first I thought she was mad at her or anything, but I was shocked when she asked me if Cory was mad at her. I told her that She’s not. And she’s actually afraid to see her in person. And like a drop of snow in the Sahara dessert, my mom actually asked me to invite Cory on a dinner or lunch out next week. She said she misses Cory a lot and she was still Mad at me for the things that I’ve done to hurt her. Well I hope Cory doesn’t disappoint my mom or turn her down. It’s a known fact that everyone in my family loved Cory. And I’m glad that it is staying that way. Calling out Cory”

To end the day, my sister came home with this huge collection of full season DVD’s of the following American series: House M.D. S1&2. Scrubs Full Season, Bones Full Season, Desperate Housewives, Numbers, and Of Course Niptuck-Full Season. And damn it was one hell of a way to spend a day at home. And I really find it nicer to enjoy most of DVD’s if you eliminate all of the background music and just plainly listen to the audible speech. Well I’m already done with the first 12 episodes of Dr. House and I plan to finish the rest this week.

Well other highlights of that two-day bliss was the Magic marathon game that Jarry and I did. We slept till 4 in the morning just playing against each other using my 5 new decks. Heheh don’t worry tsong mahahanap mo rin Magic mo.

Well that’s it! It has been a great week for me already. And it just keeps getting better. I’m having good AHT and MSI’s on my performance and I’m really enjoying my stay with AOL, Just like what tell everyone. I don’t need anything else, but that one person. I cant help to say this but I missed saying this line so please let me do it just for this moment.

I Love you more than anything in my life…. Cory!

MAGIC MAYHEM

2006-07-14T18:38:00.000+08:00

Well Guess what. After a 4 year HIATUS from MAGIC the GATHERING, I find myself back in the frenzy. Well I could still remember the every first time I played the game. It took me 5 minutes to learn it and everything’s history. Well I’m glad that I am back and starting to feel the groove again. I just bought all four champions of kamigawa pre con decks. And I already started upgrading both the Way of the Warrior and the Snake Path block. I know it cost me a lot of money, but then again it's helluva better than being wasting my time on things that wont return the credit!

MY MAGIC FACTS:
1st EXPANSION TO PLAY: Ice Age/5th ED

1st SPELL TO CAST: Mesa Pegasus

1st Deck Bought: Mirage 1st Rare Card in a Pack: Spirit of the Night/Catacomb Dragon

1st Deck theme to build: Type 1 Fire and Ice

2nd Deck them to build: Red White Knight Deck- (Flankers)

3rd Deck to build: Black/White Knight Weenie

4th Deck to Build: Type 1 Cheese Favorite Deck to have been built: Pure White (Pristine Madness-Vigilance and Protection Deck)

Favorite Card of All Time-Dakkon Blackblade

Most Expensive Deck to Have: Type 1 White Weenie.

Greatest Victory: Pristine Madness vs. Type 1 Discarder: Recto Tournament 2000!

Current Decks: Upgraded Kamigawa: Way of the Warrior, Snake Path

Current Decks in Possession: 5-Way of the Warrior, Snake Path, Rakkdos Bloodspot, Spirit Bane, Kari reborn!

The Moon is back-aint I aint stoppin till Im toppin!

Well Keep it Coming Guys. I aint stoppin til I pop!

We are nothing but warriors, bound by faith and honor...-

2006-07-11T10:52:00.000+08:00

As gloomy as it may seem, life has proven to be a surging force, that causes our minds to go on a constant spiral. The everyday challenges that drives the soul in a halt. One could go insane, with the pains and challenges that destiny brings.
One could compare an individual to a noble samurai. Sworn to both his master and his sword, the way of the warrior- "Bushido ". Bound to an everlasting dedication that could only be broken by death. We fought day and night trying to stay true to our words. But then again, one could always falter. A thousand moral deeds is not enough to pay for that single sin. And at the wake of the war we find ourselves as wounded warriors grasping our swords asking each other: "Why"? And as we go on a final hurrah, our lives begin to flash before our eyes. A single second seem a thousand years. And in thesese moments we begin to discover what our real purpose is.

As we look back, we see faces, of the people that we try to protect by the teeth of our swords, looking, laughing and saying.... You are not the one protecting me. It was you who's protecting yourselves. We go down wounded and bloody. And as we open our eyes, not a single familiar face among the vast number of warriors looking on, all of them holding out theyre hands saying....

"Give me thy hand, my brother". The journey aint over yet!

Mind Share

2006-07-10T11:08:00.000+08:00

I think this is the best explanation to what am I going thru right now!

Gotta Credit Cheryl for this one thou....

This time will never be the same as it will be
tomorrow. We always feel this sudden rush of
exhilaration during moments that we feel happy
and nostalgic to the point that we are also scared
that the fireworks won't be there forever to be seen by us. And so we push aside myriads of good
things that could have been the tipping points in
our lives and embrace the monkeys in our
shoulders that eventually would wear us down and
break us apart.

It is always easy to choose if we
only have ourselves to consider. But since we are
destined to be human and therefore have this gift of
sensibility and being able to neutralize our minds
for reason, we also live our lives around other
human beings. Our littlest decisions bear great
impact in our lives, in other's lives, in the world -
that makes choices as they are - never easy. But
we must go on, and be responsible enough to
stand by our choice.

Wow! Exactly the same thing thats been going thru my mind for the past months!

Thanks Cheryl!

Purpose...Balance...Harmony....Thanks!

2006-07-08T23:43:00.000+08:00

Minsan Di ko talaga malaman kung bakit nga ba may salitang purpose. Bakit nga ba may purpose ang isng tao o bagay sa mundo. Is it something that needs recognition in order to fully embody its meaning. Or is it an unselfish act where-in vindication is completely alienated.

************************************************************

For some "purpose" serves as a means or reason why that person performs or carry out an act for a certain cause. It could be an act of love, heroism, redemption or just plain dedication. Nobody could really justify why individualas continue to perform the "purpose" that they choose to carry out. Others could just shrugs the whole thing, even if the person serving the "purpose" is doing out of complete surrender or dedication. It is a painful process. Others might think that the person being served upon is an evil or a very ungrateful individual. But in reality it is just a rightful price that the other person have to pay.

**********************************************************

This is the basic law of justice. Balance is a ocnstant entity that keeps evryone on their righful place. Just like two persons in-love. Both start out as fresh individuals discovering the path to happiness and tranquility. Then the day comes when one or both of them learns or discovers new things, thats when the time when the scale starts to shift. One may go to the negative side of life and the other may stay put. But over all the balance or harmony between things become disrupted which result to what we call injustice.

************************************************************

Once an injustice has manifested into the lives of the people concerned it goes through a certain phase where the double edged sword we call "change" makes evryone realize what they have done. A counter action or reaction occurs on the other hand. The individual concerned on the first shift in the scale would now try to balance the equation, but at the same time the reaction that the other person generates would cause a shift on the other side. And thats when a second disorder occurs.

************************************************************

Based on the analysis above balance could only occur in two ways:

Its either both sides agree to balance the scale or have a change on either side. This is the hard fact of life. We usually try to tell ourselves that change is something that is not good, while others beg to differ. But in the end change is the only metric, that would allow us to really see if we are the right weight on one of a "scale's side".

************************************************************

A month ago I have a very unclear path on where am I going. And I would like to thank the various persons that allowed me to get to a better path.

GOD: For always being there and not letting me falter when I veer out of your path. For always giving me aht I necessarily need and nothing more. I want to thank you for always providing the answers and the light, so i could see these wonderful people whenever I feel that Im alone in the dark. I love you and Im forever indebted to you! Praise be your name!

Cory: For giving an unclear but steady supply of inspiration. I cant blame you for whatever it is that your feeling against me right now. But all I could tell you is that I am always here to be that person when everyone else is not.

************************************************************

AOL WAVE 9: A mixture of Happiness, Hate, Tears and Love has given a new meaning on my life. You have proven me that as long as a person stays positive and has an open heart to friendship. It is always you, the new people that I encounter in my life, has the right tools and (and flows heehehee) to bring me right back on tarckl, and provide me with a new spark in life and purpose.

************************************************************

Papa and Mama and my Family: For the unending support and love that you have given me. I now that sometimes I have lots and lots of bad decisions in my life. But shes the only one that I know who is really right for me. If ever there is one thing that I would ask you to let me have. There would only be one name. And that is "Mi Corazon".

************************************************************

So thats it! Im glad that I was able to right again after quite some time! And Im glad that my life is getting more and more settled by the day! To all of you My Friends and Family and especially to my most beloved person. Thank you for staying with me thru thick in thin!

************************************************************

Sorry ABout the page breaks! I cant seem to use a normal page break when logged in unto this computer. Gonna fix this blog after I get home! Thanks! Good Morning Evryone!

What a week!

2006-06-24T03:52:00.000+08:00

Well it’s been one hell of a blast for my teammates and me over at AOL Tech Wave 9. After a grueling first round and second round of assessments followed by two days of intense certification, well all I can say is t that everyone has done a very nice job on keeping us at par with the QA’s grilling questions. Most were very anxious and somewhat petrified when their turn comes.

As for me I’m very happy with the results, but it could have been better if I really gave focus right from the beginning. I was very satisfied with how everyone gave his or her best in order to keep everyone confident and relaxed.

On the lighter side, we were so glad to see that our TAs’ are very approachable and very very accommodating. Well I’m really very sleepy right now and I can’t think of mother stuff to put in here. As for now enjoy our special moments!

And to WAVE 9 Congratulations! 100%

(Just CLICK on the pic to get full size image)

The Notebook-tear jerker fun

2006-06-08T20:40:00.000+08:00

I’ve heard people refer to “The Notebook” as cheesy, as a ‘chick flick’ (a label very few of my colleagues can stand because of its negative connotation), as predictable and sappy. So “The Notebook” doesn’t exactly take a brain surgeon to guess how the story is going to play out. And it does unapologetically play on your emotions, practically begging you to squeeze out a few tears. But here’s why I enjoyed “The Notebook”: it’s a movie you can relax and let flow over you. It’s also one of the few films out there that tells a complete story. There’s a well-defined beginning, middle, and end.

“The Notebook” is the story of a boy from the poor side of the tracks who – predictably – falls for a beautiful, rich girl. What is not so predictable is how far he’ll go to prove they were meant to be together.

Rachel McAdams stars as sheltered Southern Belle, Allie Hamilton. Allie pays a visit to Seabrook, North Carolina to see her family and while there, Noah Calhoun (Ryan Gosling) works his 'small-town boy' charms on her. Despite disparate backgrounds, the two find they’ve got a lot in common, including a zest for life - and their need to drive each other crazy. Over the span of a hot North Carolina summer, Allie and Noah fall passionately in love.
But all doesn’t go smoothly for the mismatched pair of lovebirds. Allie’s mom puts the kibosh on their relationship, sending Allie off to school and out of Noah’s reach. Still Noah persists until finally, seven long years later, Allie returns to Seabrook and must choose between her rich, handsome fiancée (James Marsden) and her first love, the equally handsome but not-so-wealthy, Noah.

The filmmakers got it right when they chose Gosling, McAdams, Marsden, James Garner and Gena Rowlands. Each of these actors is pitch-perfect. Each brings a freshness to these characters. Even though we’ve seen the same types of characters before, these actors makes them feel interesting and unique.

“The Notebook” is a gentle romantic tale in the midst of blockbuster action films and goofball comedies. It could be argued that releasing it in mid-June is counter-programming at its best, giving adults who don’t want their senses assailed by CGI special effects a real choice at the box office. But you have to wonder if “The Notebook” would have stood a better chance of finding the right audience had it been released later in the year, when moviegoers are really ready for more intense storytelling, than during the crowded summer months.

“The Notebook” isn’t just a film for women. It’s a movie for anyone who wants to get lost in a beautiful story, for anyone who believes romance is still alive on film.

Bloody Hell

2006-05-30T07:21:00.000+08:00

I just survived my very first Night shift and I could say that I did well, except for the last hour wherein I am constantly slipping from consciousness and slumber. Heheh. But then again I am glad that this whole schedule would last for a month, and that would really help divert my attention from loosing Cory into something more positive. Yeas Im really devastated and sad that it turned out this way. But I cant blame anyone but myself. Well I just wanna thank my team mates for taking some of the load off my back.

Another good thing that happened during my shift was this new excitement and drive to become either a team leader or a css. I know it aint an easy task, but I hope that as time goes I myself would find the pieces and put everything together, in order for me to prove what my real worth as an individual.

Well got to go now and catch some shut eye...hehe got to go back again at around 7pm for my assesment. Wish me luck.

Moving on...and a promise!

2006-05-28T19:46:00.000+08:00

Cory...

Im gonna move on. But that doesnt mean that I dont love you anymore...I leave you with one last promise, and that is to be at your service anytime you need something that others may not be able to provide.

Always here, never gone...

Kei's Debut Invitation

2006-05-27T16:41:00.000+08:00

Happy 18th Birthday Kei!
Design by: Giancarlo Angeles

Halo Halobalu!

2006-05-27T15:15:00.000+08:00

It's been more than a week since I posted something here. Ok here’s a list of the things that had happened in the past 10 days.

First Day of work: Ok for starters, I already signed a contract with my new company: E-Telecare as a TSR for American On-line. I've been having my foundation skills training over at ICITE Libis and starting Monday, I'll be moving over to PBCom Makati for our client specific training. Hope everything turns the way I want them to be. But on the other hand I want to move over to the creative department. Nut I’m keeping my fingers crossed malay mo.

Goodbye Andrew: Our family friend Andrew died after the day of his accident. His remains were cremated last May 24. Rest in peace my friend.

Annual Antipolo Trip: Hehe well the usual Antipolo trip that me and my family have every year. Nagsimba lang and kumain tapos nagkaroon ng konting inuman sessions with the rest of the clan.

Surprises: I went over at OM (Ospital ng Maynila) last week to bring my sister's dinner to her. And guess what the last person that I expected to see there was actually...hello there. It kind of felt awkward but then again It doesn’t matter anymore. Coz there is someone in my heart; actually it’s a heart within a heart.

Odd Shifts. Sobrang madugo yung last three days ko. I had a 5am-6pm shift na sobrang nakakalanta. But then again I can’t do anything. Only consolation is that our company provided us with the amenities to make this monster shifts a little better by installing sleeping quarters and game rooms for us. Not to mention free Coffee, Hot Chocó and plenty of fruit juices whenever we have our shifts. On Monday I'll be starting my first Graveyard shift that would require me to stay from 9pm up to 6:00 am the following morning. Sarap diba?

Missing her like hell: Wala pa ring changes. I still don’t matter to her kahit na papano. Pero gagawin ko pa rin lahat para sa kanya. Siya lang ang mahal ko. Siya lang ang mahal ko wala ng iba. Sorry sa mga tao na nakilala ko. Mahal ko pa rin siya and it would take a lot to change my mind. I love Cory no one else. I’d rather stay single than not with her.

Songs to Ponder: Here sobrang satrap yung gala ko sa Eastwood City kahapon. Well una nag-concert ang Hale, and I got to get free tickets. I’ve seen X-Men 3 for free. I also got 2 New CD's from my friend Regnant. Sobrang galing kasi alam niya taste ko. Here they are:

1.) KALA-Manila High: Jeepney

Excuse me miss, mawalang galang naKanina pa kita kasi napapansin

Magkakilala ba tayo, ay hinde eh pasensya na

Excuse me miss, ako'y mangungulit lang po

Ang ganda mo palang tumawa

Pwede bang magpakilala, magpakilala sa'yo

Huwag kang matakot sa akin

Hindi ako multo

Kung ayaw mo ok lang

Pasuyo nalang ng bayad ko, ng bayad ko

Sukob na, konti nalang at aandar na ang ating jeepney

Sandaang tao ang nakasakay tila galit at naniniksik pa

Tara na, konti nalang at aandar na ang ating jeepney

yes

Hindi na makapag hintay na umuwi kasama ka

Excuse me miss, mawalang galang na

Kanina pa kita kasi napapansin

Magkakilala ba tayo, ay hinde eh pasensya na

Huwag kang matakot sa akin

Hindi ako multoKung ayaw mo ok lang

Pasuyo nalang ng bayad ko

Sukob na, konti nalang at aandar na ang ating jeepney

Sandaang tao ang nakasakay tila galit at naniniksik pa

Tara na, konti nalang at aandar na ang ating jeepney

Hindi na makapg hintay na umuwi kasama ka

Hello miss, nakatingin ka nanaman

Meron ka bang nais malaman

Aba oo, malapit ako doon

Saan sa may bicutan

Salamat ng marami

Dito na ako bababa

Tatawagan nalang kita (3x)

Sukob na, konti nalang at aandar na ang ating jeepney

Sandaang tao ang nakasakay tila galit at naniniksik pa

Tara na, konti nalang, konti nalang, konti nalang

Hindi na makapag hintay umuwing kasama ka

Just like what they say about them, this new band really made a very nice entrance into the music scene. With their semi-hip but still soulful compositions KALA could be considered as the next HOTDOG. With their down to earth subjects and uncanny image KALA gives back the "MANILA SOUND: that everyone almost forgot. Except for the fact that they kind of had some influences from P.O.T. and other similar bands, KALA has no way but up when it comes to their own brand of music.

With their debut single entitled Jeepney, one could not help but feel good when you start hearing the upbeat and catchy lyrics from this very promising band.

2.) Sitti-Cafe Bossa: Para sa Akin.

Kung ika'y magiging akin'

Di ka na muling luluha pa

Pangakong 'di ka lolokohin

Nang puso kong nagmamahal

Kung ako ay papalarin

Na ako'y iyong mahal na rin

Pangakong ikaw lang ang iibigin

Magpakailanman

'Di kita pipilitin

Sundin mo ang iyong damdamin

Hayaan na lang tumibok ang puso mo

Para sa akin

Kung ako ay mamalasin

At meron ka nang ibang mahal

Ngunit patuloy ang aking pag-ibig

Magpakailanman

'Di kita pipilitin

Sundin mo ang iyong damdamin

Hayaan na lang tumibok ang puso mo

Para sa akin

Kung ako ay papalarin

Na ako'y iyong mahal na rin

Pangakong ikaw lang ang iibigin

Magpakailanman'

Di kita pipilitin

Sundin mo ang iyong damdamin

Hayaan na lang tumibok ang puso mo

Para sa akin

'Di kita pipilitin

Sundin mo ang iyong damdamin

Hayaan na lang tumibok ang puso mo

Para sa akin...

Para sa akin...

It's been weeks since I first heard this single. But unfortunately I always end up catching only part of the song. But when I woke up this morning I was very fortunate to catch the song 100%
I don’t really care about people telling me that mushy OPM songs no longer have a place in the music industry. Now everyone goes for the emu rock genre or the pinoy band lineage but for me simple melodic serenades still hold a big place in my heart.

Well that it for me this week. Hope you guys could also share some of your fun experiences. To all the guys form wave 61, all I can say is good luck for us. And to Cory, I do again apologize, but I don’t see any reason to stop loving you. Kahit ano pa mangyari.

Yin and Yang...The Good and BAad side of one's daily life!

2006-05-21T16:21:00.000+08:00

Well what’s up guys?

I still feel very lonely. Well I haven’t heard from her for 6 days, and I really hope that this isn’t just a deliberate act of ignoring me or I hope she isn’t back with that fucking guy from las pinas. But then again all I wish is her safety and for our lord God to give her strength.

Well guess what I already have a new job. It kind of excites me coz I'm back to where I started from and that is Makati. I landed a job as a creative department director over at PB Com tower at Ayala, for E-Telecare solutions.

I was accompanied by my very gorgeous and cute cousin Kei. Afterwards we went back to my former company which is Solar Entertainment, to visit some of my former office-mates and to pick up some stuff for my dad.

We also got the chance to attend the advance screening of "Over the Hedge" (It's been quite some time since I watched an advance screening) and I say that it's kind of nice to watch an animated film that could literally make you laugh without too much slapstick comedy.

Unfortunately most of this delightful news was overshadowed by two tragic accidents that involved my uncle and a friend.

My uncle Monching suffered a mild stroke and was rushed over at UDMC. At least he is in a very stable condition right now. The other accident involved our family friend Andrew wherein he and his classmates suffered a car crash, which put him in a coma. I hope you guys would help me in praying for them, so that our Lord God may give their families the strength and for them the healing that would bring them back into health.

I still miss her like hell. Even thou a lot of people don’t understand, I still believe that she is the only person whom I could really fall in-love and no one else.

"Hope may not be the best virtue one could have, but definitely one of the strongest".

"Lo Te Amo, mi Corazon"

A not so happy birthday

2006-05-16T09:08:00.000+08:00

Wow 23 na pala ako. And Even thou napakaraming bumati and dumating sa bahay just to be with me on my birthday, Im gonna admit that it wasnt really the same. Yup the very person na gusto kong makausap the whole dayfailed to do so. I dont know if it is intentional or not, pero sobrang down ako talaga kahit na birthday ko. Yes I am very thankful that my family was there and most of my friends, but all I wanted was her to talk or chat with me to make my special day even more special. Pero walang nangyari. I waited day in day out. I guess non of my wish were meant to be granted.

Im not mad or anything, pero naiinggit lang ako kasi yung ibang tao nabati pa niya on-line and even wished them na yung birthday nila be a fine one. Pero ok lang naiintindihan ko siya. Di ko alam kung bakit ganon pero I guess this is just another test of my personality.

Well thanks sa lahat ng mga taong pumunta and nakibati. Thank you so much. And to my family salamat at naintindihan nyo lahat ng in-open ko sa inyo about what really happened before my separation, and thank you for accepting the truth.

And to myself a not so happy birthday ki!-Trying hard pa rin ako.

Some things never last!

2006-05-07T18:11:00.000+08:00

Well ano bang masasabi ko. I lost my phone last Tuesday while playing over at GBOX. Medyo masama pa rin ang loob ko kasi I really loved the phone. But then again it is alright. But another thing was more than enough to chase my bad days away. Sakin na lang yun. It may be hard or almost impossible pero happy ako. Super happy.

Pagdating naman ng thursday I was blessed to have two new sidelines to further keep my hopes of buying a new phone for me and an angel (well kung papayag siya). Medyo nakakkalungkot coz some of the good things don’t really last. It was more of a deja vu than a re-connection and at finger snap it's all gone. Not even a trace of how wonderful the last three days of this week was for me.

Well six days before my birthday and there is only one wish in my mind. But It's a close to impossible wish, but I am hoping. Coz hope is the only thing that keeps me alive and the only thing that keeps me going.

Wall advance happy birthday to the Biggest Jerk alive. And that’s me. Thank you for all the new friends, and those who were always there. I love you guys, but I love my guardian angle more than anything else in this world.

I’ve seen so many new moons and so many sunrise and sunsets. But nothing is more beautiful than the sight of your most beloved angel and her sparkly little eyes.

One wish nothing more....Thank you lord for another year

Irony

2006-04-17T13:46:00.000+08:00

Sorry about this post guys. But im just really ticked off. Bakit ba yung ibang tao napaka one-sided. I hope you guys are reading my chat box in order for you to understand the things that Im saying.

And hello kung sino ka man Honey please lalake ka and kilala ko kung sino pa. Gumamit ka naman ng proxy pag nag post ka ng di ko makita IP Address mo. Ang bobo mo pare. Feelers ka. Computer pa naman whatevr ang course mo eh wala kang alam. Stop kissing her big ass!

Secondly tanggap ko na wala na kami nin Cory ok. Nakikipagbati ako nung isang araw. Well ibibigay ko friendster niya kung ibabalik nyo yung akin. Ang problema sa inyo tatanga tanga kau. Magbubura kau alam nyo naman na mabubuking kau. Sobra. Di nga ako naka-graduate pero di naman ako kasing tanga nyo ano.

Ngaun sabihin nyo kung bakit ako nangiipit. Ako pa selfish. Susmaryosep ako selfish. Ikaw na tong magkasama kayo sa Birthday niy at tri-neat mo pa sa restaurant. Pero ang gusto niyang bumati sa kanya eh ibang guy. Talk about shit. Tinatanong ko naman kung may lalke siya. And kayo ano ma-feel nyo binilhan mo na nga ng phone tapos ibang lalake ka text. Ngaun sabihin nyo na ok lang sa inyo yun. Ayaw ko siyang i-berate openly kahit na ganun ginawa niya sa blog niya. Pero ayaw niyang tumigil kak-side comments and ayaw niyang kalasan yung lalakeng taga las pinas and sinusuportahan pa ng mga kaklase niya. Uulitin ko na lang ang words ni Cory tuwing hihilingin ko sa kanya na magkaayos kami.

I reflect what you give! Si na uso Martyr....

"Di ko na Problema yun!".

My New Motorazr:

2006-04-06T11:58:00.000+08:00

I came in at around 10:30 this morning (damn the coastal road trraffic) and I was lucky enough to arrive ahead of my boss. After taking my usual bacon and egg breakfast our receptionist informed me that a package under my name arrived earlier and she just received it for me(wawa naman yung courier).

I went into my room (medyo tense na kasi I haven't receive any package since last month when my laptop arrive) and found a small fed-ex wrapped package on top of my table. Heheeh. And guess whats' inside....A brand new Motorazr v3 (well kakainis lang kasi pink). Hehehee. Grabe sobrang nakakatuwa kasi sobrang astig kaya nung phone.

Well you might be wondering who sent me the phone. It was actually a gift from my aunt last christmas. nahuli lang talaga yung pagpapadala niya ng package (wel feel ko sa kanya yun kaya pink heheeh ok lang ). But then again Im very thanful kasi Ibibigay ko na lang sa dad ko coz when I bought my SE K750i sabi niya type niya daw yung unit.

Well just like my blog's tag-line: Life aint always full of shit!

Going Crazy: Feels Like Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde

2006-04-05T18:47:00.000+08:00

Damn. Im kinda getting disturbed this past few days. Well I really dont want to say bad things to Cory, or even to say a lot of derrogative remarks. Pero whenever I hear that guy's name or even remember Cory's post about him being the "Man" whom she wanted to greet her on her birthday really makes me snap.

Call me bitter or stupid. But come on who is this guy. Yup I did something wrong to Cory, and evey guy who have the hots for her, would definitely play the "guy to the rescue role". Im not saying this para siraan si Dani, but hello I've been to more relaionships than this guy. Yup Ilang years din kami nagsama ni Cory, at least she should give me that. Wala akong sinusumbat but then again, can this guy support Cory to the very extent of risking more than he has to. DamnI would die for Cory if I have to. And dont say that it's all for drama or mali but Im willing to go that far if she needs it. I wont let some "schoolboy nextdoor" use her as a training field. No no. Not Cory. Yup Ive' don shit to her but I wont let aything happen to her. But then again there is Dani. Who is this guy. Tell me who is this guy....!

Well a lot of people know that I ain't like this. But the very reminder of the said details really makes me go berserk. I can manage whatever Cory throws me, or I would even drop my sword for her. But when the image of that damn guy passes through my mind, everything starts to go black. Well I hope I can cope up. Heres the bottomline, I would endure anything for Cory, but with that guy's memory and how much importance she gave him, really pisses me off.

Damn. Im sorry for everything Cory, but get him off our case and were' good.

As for you buddy, sorry for the term but please fuck off! Or Else!

I know that this time I play the role of the Bad Guy here. OK lang. If thats what you guys think. Pero sana youll guys think kung ano talaga si Cory para sa akin. And youll know bakit nagkakagaito ako. It aint fun, and it aint easy. I may have everything, except peace of mind. Thanks.

Ambushed Makeover

2006-04-01T12:15:00.000+08:00

Where: Moongroup Office

Hearing What: Stephen Bishop-Never Letting Go, Neyo-So Sick, Lisa Angelle-The First Time I Loved Forever, Alicia Keys-Goodbye.

I’m with: My Cousin Kei

Yesterday I had a makeover (after finally getting the guts and my parent's approval). It all started with the usual spa and massage treatment (It was a gift given to me by my college mates after our last reunion) from the "Grand Spa" over at Alabang town center. Man I never thought I was that stressed. After having the conventional scalp and full body massage, I was given the chance to undergo 30 minutes of steam bathing, which was then followed by a very soothing Javanese Royal Bath, Citrus Body Polish and Foot scrub services.

Now comes the fun part. Well as everyone knows I’m really not much of a hair treatment person, but with some relentless persuasion and "kantiyaw from my buddies" I finally said yes. I was asked to pick a base color from a list of basic shades for men. At first I was really afraid that the color would be too vibrant or in some cases to weak. But after my stylist "Nene" assured me that there is a 95% chance that the shade would match the one from list.

So the usual routine of cutting the hair to it's desired style, followed by multiple shampooing and conditioning then finally applying the hair color (base color), lasted for about an hour. When I first saw my newly colored hair, I was very surprised coz it really made a certain change. My hair no longer look dull and I no longer see any of those pesky gray hairs that I used to have since the second grade.

After that I was once again given a list of shades for the hair highlights. I decided to go for a ash-blonde shade for it is by common knowledge that the darker your skin tone is, the more you should choose lighter shades for your hair. Another hour was consumed for this task. Well it didn’t turn out the way I expected it to be (I would have asked for the ash-platinum streak that my sister is using), but I still love the color. To finish everything off a hair spa treatment helped the color to wash out faster.

It was almost 9 pm (I came in at around 6:00) and I haven’t done my groceries yet. Before leaving ATC, I've spotted this crystal casing (hard plastic protector) for my SE K750i and as expected I bought it and hurriedly encased my priced phone. No more scratches and smudges on the screen, an I can now ditch the leather casing that I've both for it last week. Hehehe.

Well...that’s it for now.... this post will be modified again later. Got to shop for some software and other stuff for my new laptop. Heheeh!

Memories of TAFT

2006-03-30T14:11:00.001+08:00

Where: The Moon Group Office
Hearing What: The Calling- Stigmatized

Well its really a very chilly day here in the office (I dont know if it's me or the airconditioning is just to cold). Anyweiz I have nothing muh to do for today so I decided to start working on this new post. While on my way here in Alabang I decided to take snapshots of TAFT Ave and guess what, I came up with a very nice idea for a post. So even thou Im still shaking of my writing rust, hope you could enjoy this post and please feel free to comment on whatever things or elements you find disgusting or interesting. By the way I would like to thank the guys who left their messages and comments on my cbox. And kudos to Tita Andrea for her champion Bacon and Egg meal, that I had for breakfast. Hehehe.

Monday March 8, 2006 was the last time that I’ve been to TAFT Avenue. For 3 years this historical district in Manila was a very memorable and significant place for me. It holds a lot of wonderful memories, moments and even bad ones. But over all Taft Ave is one place that played a very important part in my life. And that life was filled with love, passion, care, happiness, pain, sorrow and separation. From the busy streets of Malvar and Pedro Gil to the Glowing Lights of Baywalk. The sights and sounds of Robinson's Place, and the mouthwatering treats from Mc Do-P.Gil Branch. Evreything reminds me of the good ol' days. When evrything was still sound and beautiful. Manong's Siopao, The Tambayan PC Shop, The Pitt Grillery, Mini Stop, Starbucks, Twister Fries, Power Books, Nike, G-Box, Jolibee, Oody's, Friday's etc. Everything and evrywhere holds a very special moment in my heart. So oncce again let's look back at the sights and sounds of my beloved TAFT.

Here are some of the pics that Iv'e taken earlier.

About the Song: Well this song has a very interesting effect on me. When I first read the lyrics, I was able to relate and really feel the song (that explains the LSS that I’ve been having lately). But the weird thing is that instead of me being so emotionally flushed or lonely, the song actually brightens up my day. Yeah its really weird, cause when most people who had heartaches in the past would literally use this song as a buffer, I on the other hand actually feed on the song to help me get through my day. Well the lyrics are very straightforward. While one person tries to break free and immerse themselves into the changes that life has in-stored for them, there is another who tries to stay in that world that the two of them had built. And for that person being apart could mean a new beginning or a bright change for both of them, while for the other it is the release he or she have been longing for. Change is always a welcome solution, but sometimes there are far better things than change.

Stigmatized-The Calling

If I give up on you I give up on me
If we fight what's true, will we ever be
Even God himself and the faith I knew
Shouldn't hold me back, shouldn't keep me from you

Chorus:
Tease me, by holding out your hand
Then leave me, or take me as I am
And live our lives, stigmatized

I can feel the blood rushing though my veins
When I hear your voice, driving me insane
Hour after hour day after day
Every lonely night that I sit and pray

Chorus
We live our lives on different sides,
But we keep together you and I
Just live our lives, stigmatized

We'll live our lives, We'll take the punches everyday
We'll live our lives I know we're gonna find our way

I believe in you
Even if no one understands
I Believe in you, and I don't really give a damn
If we're stigmatized
We live our lives on different sides
But we keep together you and I
We live our lives on different sides

We're gonna live our lives
Gotta live our lives
We're gonna live our lives

We're gonna live our lives, Gonna live our lives,

Stigmatized

"It's been 4 days and I havent heard from the Bird. I presume it found a better nest and a better bird. Hopefully not.

For the Bird:

A memory is what is left when something happens and does not completely unhappen
Everyone has memories - but only a fool stores the past in the future
We do not remember days; we remember moments

My New Office: A new space for a new face

2006-03-29T18:06:00.000+08:00

Where:The Moon Group Office Hearing What: Alicia Keys-A woman's Worth

Well it’s been a month since my knee surgery and I've finally moved to another company called "The Moon Group" over in Alabang. Well I usually start my day at 6 (damn used to wake up an hour and half later when I was with Solar). Well waking up earlier doesn’t mean that I'm always the early bird. Before it used to take me an hour and a half to get from my place in Sampaloc to Bel-Air. But now it takes me at least 2 hours to get to my new office. Well that really doesn’t matter coz of a 10 AM "clock in time". I now take two bus rides rather than an FX and bus route that I used to do before.

My route now requires me to get a ride to the Ayala-Taft Intersection and from there another bus would take me all the way to Alabang-Zapote road right across Honda Alabang. Well that’s a plus for me coz I do get the chance to get that "extra" sleep (even before I pass by Pedro Gil and Malvar...more info on this statement on my future posts) for the earlier wake up time that I’m used to doing now.

Well what can I say about my new office. Well two words love it! Ok for starters I now have my own room and not jut a space or a cubicle but a room! Sometimes I can’t believe how much privacy I have now compared to my former office. Now I don’t have to worry about people watching everything that I’m browsing or doing. Well it’s a good thing my boss loaded up my desk with the stuff any office guy could die for. I have Pentium 4 powered 1.80 Ghz pc with at least 1gb of ram, enough to render almost any Photoshop and Video Editor outputs. (Well it also helps with my Winkawaks gaming hehe rival schools and Zelda runs smoothly without any lag). I have my own scanner, printer and best of all, my very own digital tablet. Sweet!

Well honestly speaking it took me quite some time before I finally settled in with my new environment. But overall it’s been one hell of a time. And by the way I’m working again with one of the best persons that I’ve ever been with. And that person is Mr. Ron Regis my former Dept.Head from Solar Entertainment. Well I’ve included some pictures for you guys. Well that’s it for now. I’m not really into my blogging mood today, and I want to apologize if my initial post is a bit bland. But I do promise to do better next time. Well have a nice day guys and hope to hear from you.

P.S: - Feel free to drop a line or two on my Chat Box so I can plug your Blog (if you have one and vice versa)

-I haven’t heard from the bird for three days now, guess I have to wait a little bit longer or maybe it's in another nest

-I want to say thank you to Kimmy Edwards for her wonderful words of advise and comfort

-Still restless this past few days. Sleeping is more of a time out (from the mental and emotional Stress) rather than a period of rejuvenation.

-A message for the Bird:

Promise only what you can deliver. Then deliver more than you promise.
Promises are like babies: easy to make, hard to deliver.

Welcome

2006-03-28T18:51:00.000+08:00

Where: I-Lounge Computer Shop
Hearing What: Rick Price's Heaven Knows Acoustic

About the song: Well it really describes what I underwent in my love life before. I know its kind of cheesy but then again life must go on. Other people might require changes in their lives, but for me things are a little less complicated and I must try to live my life again.

I have no regrets and things may not be as fun as they were before but definitely someone from the past or someone new may give me the answer, and I’m definitely ready for anything. But there is one thing that I would definitely not do. And that is to deprive someone of hope. Coz I know what’s it like and I can’t stand seeing someone loose his or her hopes…for it may be the last thing that they have.

Well this is my New Blog and I want to thank you for visiting it. I’m just putting in all of the finishing touches, and all of the necessary file associations so that you and I can enjoy a more interactive and more viewer friendly blog. Here I would tackle most of my everyday experience and would also cater to those of my close friends old or new. So sit back and relax for the upcoming days would be filled with lots and lots of reading goodies for my visitors and me. Please feel free to leave a message on my chat box so that I myself could help you plug your blog and vice versa.

Remember, life aint always about shit!

Thanks you and God Bless!